Country Puns

Welcome to the Geographic Humor of country puns!

Country Puns

What do you call four Spanish guys in a capsized boat?
Quatro sinko.
What do you call a rental car in Spain?
A Barceloaner.
I'll be making a movie about the Greek alphabets.
It's a Psi Phi film.
What speech did Abraham Lincoln give when he went to Italy?
The Spaghetties-burg Address.
Son: I was really Hungary and I ate the whole Turkey. There is only Greece left.
Me: I couldn’t Bolivia!
How did citizens of Ancient Greece measure land for crops?
By Demeter.
In Spain, you should not develop a program beyond 2.0.
Because that would be over dos.
"There's a woman trapped under a motorway bridge in Italy."
"Genoa?"
"I'm not sure, I can't see her face."
My friend learned Spanish by jotting sentences repeatedly...
He used wrote learning.
Another cheese factory in France exploded...
I Camembert to hear this joke again!
I checked my phone bill after my trip to Italy, and it said I spent DCXII dollars.
I must have left on Data Roman.
Why did Italy surrender in WW2?
Because Italics aren't bold.
Brother: "My friend John is in Greece studying abroad."
My Dad: "What's her name?"
What does a Greek God say when they answer the phone?
"Whodisious?"
Did you know the first French fries weren't actually cooked in France? They were cooked in Greece.
What do you call a Greek love song?
An Aphro-ditty.
German tourist visits France.
Guy at the Airport: "Nationality?"

German Dude: "German".

Airport Guy: "Occupation?"

German Dude: "Nein, nein, Only Vacation".
How do Greek gods say sorry to one another
"I Apollo-gise"
How do you leave any building in Spain?
You "follow salida lida lida..."
I bought a 400 year-old chair from Italy,
but as soon as I sat on it, it baroque.
Did you hear that cats have carried out a Coup in Barcelona and declared independence from Spain?
They're calling themselves the Republic of Catalo-nya.
I like to say mucho when i’m talking to my Spanish speaking friends.
It means a lot to them.
What is a Greek dog’s favorite dessert?
Barklava!
A few years ago, I had a job translating pre-Classical Greek literature into Braille.
It feels like ancient history.
What do you call an elderly Spanish man?
A senõr citizen.
A mummified macaroni pizza was uncovered in Italy today.
The man who uncovered it says "It's a pizza of our pasta."
Where do recluses live in Spain?
Barceloner.
A lot of William Shakespeare’s plays were based off of old Greek and Roman performances
That's playgarism if you ask me.
It’s impossible to Rouen a trip to France.
In Ancient Greece, people who had beliefs contrary to the worship of Poseidon were executed for Heresea.
In Greek Mythology, Chiron was not only half man and half horse, he was also a doctor of medicine
That made him the centaur for disease control.
Other people had drugs in school, but I brought Greek cheeses.
That way I could have math and feta cheese.
What did the father ant said to his son when they moved to France from America?
Son, we are now Europeants!
Have you heard of the tallest tower in France?
It’s a real Eiffel.
I read Reims of info before I got here, but nothing can prepare you for how beautiful this place is.
I love a good shindig. Just call me Napoleon Bonapart-y.
Did you hear about the famous Spanish streaker?
Senor Willy.
I was joking with my mailman, and said I had a package to ship to Spain.... to Parcelona...
He didn't laugh though. The key to a joke like that is the delivery.
What did Sophocles call his dating service in Ancient Greece?

Oedipal Arrangements.
I asked my buddy if he wanted to know what the word “the” was in Spanish. He expressed his disinterest and I responded with...
"Your los."
Which bus went from Spain to America?
Columbus.
Why do they eat snail in France?
Because they don’t have fast food.
What is the most popular flower in France?
Croissanthemums.
My boss brought bagels for breakfast and asked me which one I wanted. I said "give me one of the Spanish bagels". He responded " One of the Spanish Bagels?"
"Ay poppy."
In Italy there is a group pf moms creating soft cheese...
They brand themselves as MOMzarella.
Did you hear of the new disease going through France?
I've heard it was a Paris-ite.
So there’s this Spanish magician. His main trick was performing a spectacular vanishing act. He said that he’d vanish on the count of three. “Uno” “Dos”
And then he vanished, without a tres.
Why did everyone want to go to Italy during World War II?
They were Fascistanating.
Where do folks from Bilbao, Spain buy outdoor equipment?
The Basque Pro Shop.
Me and my friend were going to a costume party. He told me he was coming as a small island off the coast of Italy.
I said don’t be Sicily.