Tour Jokes

Once a year, I take my family on a tour of various nuclear facilities.
While my kids like it, my wife says it’s just a power trip.
A quadriplegic man became famous playing beautiful piano classics with only his nose, ears, chin, and forehead.
Before going on stage to perform, his tour manager would say, "Alright John. It's time to face the music."
What does the Tour de France and Amsterdam have in common?
They both have a bunch of people on drugs riding around on bikes.
Girl, you are the spark that lights my fire.
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Come on, I’ll give you a tour of my tent...
Why do blues musicians tour the most in the summer? So they can visit all their kids.
Took a tour of Pisa, Italy...
Tour guide said “Hello, my name is Eileen.”
I Tour de Francy you.
It’s your birthday, there is no cure,
Cakes and candles, you must endure,
Quick and painless, let me assure,
A tiny chance, you will be mature,
With this crowd, usually secure,
Random fun, with results obscure,
Liquids we drink, definitely pure,
Goofy friends, minds we tour,
Hilarious birthday, that’s for sure.

(Martin Dejnicki)
If you don’t have a lot of figurines from Ancient Greek mythology, I can give you a mini tour.
Native Americans used to have their own professional tennis tournaments, and provided free housing to players from other tribes. They called it the A Tee Pee Tour. (No disrespect to Native Americans!)
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