Bond Jokes

I wish I was an ion, so I could form an exothermic bond with you.
How about we go back to my place and form a covalent bond?
Why was James Bond kicked out of a toilet?
Because it was not agent's toilet.
What did the bottled water tell the spy?
The names bond, Hydrogen bond.
What's the difference between a Viking and that one Bond movie where he's in space?
One's *Moonraker*, the other's a rune maker.
What did the salt say when the phosphate asked to bond with it?
"NaCl ater."
What’s a whale’s favorite James Bond movie?
A License To Krill.
What do you call James Bond with no beard ?
Agent Zero Zero Shaven.
Why does James Bond Have grey hair?
Because there's no time to dye!
What did James Bond’s mom say as she was giving birth?
"I’ve been expecting you, Mr. Bond."
What do you call James Bond taking a bath?
Bubble 07
"Marriage is a bond between a person who never remembers anniversaries and another who never forgets them." - Anonymous
“Marriage is the bond between a person who never remembers anniversaries and another who never forgets them.”—Ogden Nash
Why doesn't james bond fart in bed?
Because it'll blow his cover
What is a blue whale’s favourite James Bond Film?
Licence to Krill.
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