A man arrived to a gun fight with nothing other than a pencil and paper.
He then proceeded to draw his weapon.
Why don't they make boats out of peppers?
Because they're always capsaicin!
What do you call a big boat full of fish
A carp ark.
A functional gun shoots
While a broke one needs troubleshooting.
Help!!! There's nobody steering this yacht!!
Don't worry. It's on yachtopilot.
Why don't boats have funerals?
They have wakes.
Have you heard about the guy who made a bomb out of a brain?
It was pretty mindblowing.
What do you call a skeleton with a mask and a knife? A heartless killer.
If I ever get drafted into the Navy, and they make me choose what boat to get on.
I would just say frig it.
What do you call the first person to kill someone with a gun?
First person shooter
What do sailors buy to customise the back of their ships?
Aft-ermarket parts!
What did the Bluetooth say as the ship went down?
"Help! We’re syncing!"
Why did Immanuel Kant lend his machine gun to forces plotting a military coup?
Because he willed that his Maxim could make a general rule.
I wanted to tell a knife joke to my friend
But it just won't cut it.
Before my surgery my anaesthetist offered to knock me out with gas or a boat paddle.
It was an ether/oar situation.
I went to test my new gun at the range, but couldn’t make it work.
Now I have to read the trouble shooting section of the manual.
If you ever have to defuse a bomb, never cut...
The Blew wire.
What do you call a selfish bomb?
Mine.