My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer.
I'm not too worried, I think she's jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf.
Used to never be able to use the WiFi at my farm until I moved my router to the barn.
Now I have a stable connection.
Why did the computer spy get fired?
She couldn't hack it.
Just received Areal Flood Advisory notification on my phone
I should hope it's a real one, the fake ones are just annoying.
Why did the computer parts salesman quit?
He lost his drive.
Computers can be very good at golf because of their hard drives.
How can someone tell if a bee is on their phone? They'll get a buzzy signal.
Why did the hard drive crash?
Because it had a bad driver.
My mom told me that sitting on a computer 8 hours a day in unhealthy
I said: But, mom that's why I am using a chair.
I was at a funeral & asked the priest for the WiFi password
"Have some respect for the dead!" he said
I replied "Is that all lower case?"
My Wifi password is "writtenontherouter"
And I let all my guests walk to the router and let them unsuccessfully try to use the initial password until I tell them it's literally "writtenontherouter".
Two days ago, I named my Wifi to "Hack it if you can".
Yesterday it was changed to "Challenge accepted".
You might be able to use a smuggled cell phone in prison.
You just have to have cell coverage.
The rancher's Wifi wasn't working so he moved the router to the barn...
Now he has a stable connection
Why did the keyboard not get any sleep?...
Because it has two shifts.
What do you call a gushing keyboard?
sqwerty
What is a phone's favorite TV show? Game of Phones.
Why don't skeletons have a mobile? They don't have any body to talk to.
I've got no home, I haven't got control, and I can't see any escape.
I should get a new keyboard.
I did it! Dad said to save my money til my balance looks like a phone number.....
Available balance: $9.11.
What happens when you turn on a computer?
You turn it's floppy disk into a hard disk.
Changed my password to fortnight but apparently that's two week.
My dad enjoys writing jokes and storing them on my phone. He calls it his Dad-a-base.
Today my "O" button on my keyboard stopped working.
Maybe it was a sign I should've stopped o-ppressing the keyboard.
I want to tell you one more painful phone pun but I decided it's uncalled for.
If they could prove cell phones give deadly radiation
You could say to people you don't like "cant talk right now, you're giving me cancer".
I'm not like other keyboards...
I'm qwerty
While I was driving, I saw another person driving while talking on his cell phone.
I got so mad, I threw my beer at him.
Playing the keyboard is...
my type of music.
An American guy visits a friend in Scotland.
When he arrives at his friend's house, he asks "Can I use your Wifi?"
The friend looks a bit perplexed, but then he smiles and says, "Sure ye can, she's up th' stairs."
I was conned into believing that my hotel room in Moscow had free Wifi.
I remember the ad saying: Internyet.
I hate it when planes don't have free WiFi.
It drives me bored air line crazy.
What do you do if you spill maple syrup all over your keyboard?
Just turn off sticky keys.
How did the computer hackers get away from the scene of crime?
They just ransomware.
Apparently Dracula sets up a password for every website so he can click on Your Account.
Entered what I ate today into my new fitness app and it just sent an ambulance to my house.
What did the therapist say to the angry client when their cell phone battery died?
I suggest you find an outlet!
Q. What did the computer say to the cookie?
A. "Can I have your chocolate chip?"
Did you hear about the keyboard that lost it's Period Key?
He was missing the point.
Why does Mr. Potato need a cell phone? Incase Mr. Onion Rings.
What is a computer's favorite animal?
A RAM.
My son accidentally smashed his foot on the table and as he was hopping around the room screaming in pain, I rushed to the phone, picked it up and asked him, "Do you want me to call..."
"...a TOE TRUCK!!??"
The umpire kept answering his phone during the softball game.
He said he didn't want to miss any calls.
What's the tastiest part of a floppy disk?
The cookie!
I was dating a keyboard but we had to break up...
...she just wasn't my type.
Why did the computer wear glasses?
To improve its web sight.
Are you WiFi?
Because I can feel the connection between us.
Dear keyboard manufacturers, I'm writing to request a redesign so that g and t wouldn't be right next to each other. Retards
4G, or not 4G, that is the question.
In an attempt to deter computer hackers I've changed all my passwords to 'Brazil Nut'
That will be a hard one to crack.