While I was driving, I saw another person driving while talking on his cell phone.
I got so mad, I threw my beer at him.
I was conned into believing that my hotel room in Moscow had free Wifi.
I remember the ad saying: Internyet.
Wel'l Wel'l Wel'l - if it isn't autocorrect.
My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer.
I'm not too worried, I think she's jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf.
I love complimentary WiFi.
It makes me feel good about myself.
IF YOU GUYS SEE A LINK ON FACEBOOK THAT SAYS "GET A MILLION DOLLARS FOR FREE" DON'T CLICK ON IT.
IT IS A VIRUS THAT PUTS YOUR PHONE'S KEYBOARD ON CAPS LOCK.
I want to tell you one more painful phone pun but I decided it's uncalled for.
Apple is announcing a new cell phone for children.
iKid you not.
He couldn't get over his dead wife, so he got a new computer
Now he can processor.
What is a phone's favorite TV show? Game of Phones.
My wife asked: "What's our WiFi?"
I said: It's an internet connection that works wirelessly through something called a modem. Why?"
She hasn't spoken to me all week.
Q. How does a tree get on the computer?
A. It logs on!
I am really good with PowerPoint because I Excel at it.
Two days ago, I named my Wifi to "Hack it if you can".
Yesterday it was changed to "Challenge accepted".
I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
Apparently my password needs to be capitals only so I've changed it to LONDONMADRIDROME.
Since getting sober, I decided to go with the cheapest cell phone provider I can find!
Way fewer bars!!!
Ever hear about the computer programmer who moved to Mexico?
He wanted to be a Señor developer.
I now pronounce you husband and wifi
You may kiss the bride goodbye.
Someone just called my phone, sneezed and then just hung up.
I am getting sick and tired of these cold calls.
What do computers do on a beach vacation?
Surf the net.
Today my "O" button on my keyboard stopped working.
Maybe it was a sign I should've stopped o-ppressing the keyboard.
I changed my password to "incorrect". So whenever I forget what it is the computer will say "Your password is incorrect".
What did the phone say to begin the race?
On your marks, handset, go!
I wasn't making enough money as a keyboard percussionist so I started moonlighting as gun salesperson.
I go from glockenspiel to Glock and spiel.
I came into the office early and switched as many M and N keys on keyboards as I could. Some might say I'm a monster...
But others will say nomster
My partner got mad when she found so much spam on my computer.
She said, "Food belongs on a plate!"
I left my job at the keyboard factory today. To be honest, I had been looking for an Escape for a while.
My sister's laptop is so sassy and fun, it loves to play disc-o music.
How does a computer learn something new?
Bit by bit.
You know you're texting too much when...
you try to text, but you're on a landline!
I want anarchy
Because my keyboard is missing one.
What made the computer so smart?
Because he listened to his motherboard!
A robot is eating a hard drive for lunch.
The robot's friend asks for a bite and the robot says "Sure, but just a small bite." His friend takes a bite and the robot shouts, "Hey! That's a megabyte!"
Mobile phones have been around longer than people think.
I was watching this film the other day and heard Sir Lancelot ask someone to fetch his charger.
Which hard drive is always the happiest?
Disk C:
This time last year I was working as a computer programmer, installing auto correct. But out of nowhere..
.. I was fried for no raisin.
My mobile phone has a tuneless ring tone. It's chordless.
My mom told me that sitting on a computer 8 hours a day in unhealthy
I said: But, mom that's why I am using a chair.
How does a pirate communicate? With his aye phone.
I for one
is something you might do if you had a broken keyboard
What did the therapist say to the angry client when their cell phone battery died?
I suggest you find an outlet!
Used to never be able to use the WiFi at my farm until I moved my router to the barn.
Now I have a stable connection.
What is a computer's favorite animal?
A RAM.
Keep Your Friends Close, Your Utility Keys Closer.
My father said that there was a bug on my computer. The bug was trying to eat one byte at a time.
If a cat broke your computer...
Would it be that an error has o-purred ?
Why did the computer squeak? Because someone stepped on its mouse!
What do hackers do on a boat?
Phishing.
Where do phones like to travel?
To the Great Call of China!