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Since Jokes

Funny Money Quotes
"Money frees you from doing things you dislike. Since I dislike doing nearly everything, money is handy." ~ Groucho Marx
Twinkle Twinkle Funny Poems
Twinkle Twinkle little star,
how I wonder where you are.
Giant thermonuclear reaction,
held by gravitational attraction.
Twinkle, twinkle little star,
you look small since you're so far!
Food Poems
She had so many chances
Yet she kept muffin it up
Butter intentions were good
Just not much coffee in her cup

Couldn’t make a good decision
Too much waffling back and forth
Always peppered with doubt
Should she head south, no maybe north

Still, she was fun at a party
I would say, hummus a tune
She’d say, Icing because I’m happy
As the words began to croon

Maybe that’s what’s most important
Omelet let her off the hook
So she’s always in a pickle
Doesn’t do things by the book

Once again, I’m gonna help her
Since she is such a good egg
I said, girl, you’d go much farther
If you weren’t such a nut Meg

(Mike Gentile)
Orange Puns
Since her parents wanted to become wealthy fast, they ensured their daughter had an orange-d marriage.
Are You Pick Up Lines
Are you a florist? Cause ever since I met you, my life has been Rosey.
Space Pick Up Lines
I’m like planet Neptune. I’m attracted to the gravitational pull from Uranus since it is so big, and I cannot lie.
How about you let me take you to the Planetarium? You seem to belong there since your beauty is celestial.
Elf Puns
Elves usually make fantastic listeners since they happen to be all ears.
Music Pick Up Lines
My frinds call me Legato, since I'm so smooth
Kangaroo Puns
Local restaurant has kangaroo loin and it’s actually pretty good
It’s been awhile since I had it, but I remember it being a little jumpy and has a kick.
Clothes Pick Up Lines
Do you need new shoes?
Coz you've been running through my mind since the day I met you.
Movie Pick Up Lines
"Going out with you would be my biggest break since the rural juror."
- 30 Rock
Funny Break Up Lines
There's something I've been wanting to say since the day we met. Goodbye.
Funny Poems
There was a very cautious man
Who never laughed or played
He never risked, he never tried,
He never sang or prayed.
And when he one day passed away,
His insurance was denied,
For since he never really lived,
They claimed he never really died.
Garden Puns
Has anyone else's gardening skills improved during this quarantine like mine have?
I planted myself on the sofa at the beginning of April and I've grown bigger ever since.