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Invest Jokes

Tableware Puns
Turned down an opportunity to invest in a company making frosted glass balls. Couldn’t see any future in it.
Stove Puns
Invest in grills!
They're hot steakholders!
Crab Puns
Where do crabs invest their money?
A sea bank.
Knife Puns
My friend is trying to persuade me to invest in his knife making business.
He made some excellent points.
Cat Puns
Why did the cat invest in the stock market? He thought is was a good op-paw-tunity
Parrot Puns
Where do parrots invest their money?
In the stork market
Funny Money Quotes
“October: This is one of the particularly dangerous months to invest in stocks. Other dangerous months are July, January, September, April, November, May, March, June, December, August and February.” Mark Twain