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Hire Jokes

One Liners and Short Jokes
For his birthday, an old man’s nephews secretly hire a call girl for him. When he answers the door she’s standing there in a slinky black dress. She says, “I’m here to give you super se*.”

After thinking for a minute the old man replies, “I guess I’ll have the soup.”
Koala Puns
Why did the manager hire the marsupial? Because he was koala-fied.
Ancient Greek Monster Puns
Why did the ad agency hire a hydra?
She knew how to wear many different hats.
Sports Puns
Why shouldn't you hire a volleyball player to be your bartender?
The service may be excellent, but he'll try to spike all the drinks.
Frankenstein Puns
Why did Dr. Frankenstein hire Igor as his assistant?
He had a hunch about him.
Jokes For Women
When my boss asked me who is the stupid one, me or him? I told him everyone knows he doesn't hire stupid people.
Gorilla Puns
Why did the advertising tycoons hire a bunch of apes?
They were running a gorilla marketing campaign.
Math Puns
What happens when you hire an odd-job guy to do 8 jobs?
They only do 1, 3, 5 and 7.
One Liners for Kids
Why did the manager hire the marsupial? Because he was koala-fied.
Tennis Puns
I want to play my match outdoors so I can hit the ball higher in the air. I’m not good at persuading people, so I’m going to hire a lob-byist.
Ghost Puns
What kind of writer did the ghost hire to write his biography? A ghostwriter, duh.
Baseball Puns
Why did the pirate captain want to hire a baseball player?
He knew he had a chest protector.
The Bear and His Freezer
A polar bear carries a large freezer into an ice factory. On his way inside, he's stopped by a penguin wearing a tie and a name tag and carrying a clipboard. "Why are you bringing a freezer into an ice factory??" The penguin asked. "I'm a new hire," the polar bear replied, "I brought it with me because back home it freezes EVERYTHING. I thought it'd help me do my new job better." "Oh....Oh!" The penguin says, "I get it. I think there must be a misunderstanding. You brought it to 'make' the ice but it's your job to 'BREAK' the ice." "Oh." Said the Polar Bear. Then after a small pause he says, "So, why did the polar bear carry a freezer into the ice factory?"