Spain Puns

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Spain Puns

My friend learned Spanish by jotting sentences repeatedly...
He used wrote learning.
What do you call an elderly Spanish man?
A senõr citizen.
So there’s this Spanish magician. His main trick was performing a spectacular vanishing act. He said that he’d vanish on the count of three. “Uno” “Dos”
And then he vanished, without a tres.
It’s lonely between Germany and Spain
Not many France, nobody’s Nice to me, everyone seems to be Lyon. It’s just Eiffel.
I went to Spain to attend the Running of the Bulls, but when I arrived, there was nothing there but cows with fake horns attached.
I was in shambles.
I've finally worked out why Spain is so good at football
Nobody expects the Spanish in position.
I asked my buddy if he wanted to know what the word “the” was in Spanish. He expressed his disinterest and I responded with...
"Your los."
Did you hear that Mexicans created a machine that dispenses fish?
They call it a pez dispenser.
What do you call a hangover when you're alone in Spain?
Barf-a-lona.
I heard the King of spain caught Covid...
Heard he tested positive while on his plane going somewhere, now he has to quarantine there.

So the Reign in Spain remains solely on the Plane.
What is the call of a Spanish speaking owl?
Quién...Quién.
I was joking with my mailman, and said I had a package to ship to Spain.... to Parcelona...
He didn't laugh though. The key to a joke like that is the delivery.
Where do recluses live in Spain?
Barceloner.
Did you hear about the famous Spanish streaker?
Senor Willy.
What do you call four Spanish guys in a capsized boat?
Quatro sinko.
What do you call a sneezing big foot in Spanish?
Achoopacabra.
How does Mr. Bean introduce himself in Spain?
Soy Bean.
What do you call a rental car in Spain?
A Barceloaner.
My collection of Swiss watches was stolen in Spain.
Adios Omegas.
Vasco de Balboa told the Queen of Spain, “I discovered a large body of water on my journey.”
She said, “Could you be a little more pacific?”
I like to say mucho when i’m talking to my Spanish speaking friends.
It means a lot to them.
I used to live in in Aragon, in Spain.
Then I left.
I'm Aragone.
So in my trip to Spain i got attacked by a bull.
Oh man that's spainful.
Whats a good Spanish sports channel?
ESBieN.
You heard about the Spanish woman that is now a man?
He’s called Senor Rita.
What do you call someone from Spain who lives near the Portuguese border?
Span-ish.
What was Michael Jackson's favorite Spanish food?
Jamon!
What will you call two quizzers having a date in spain comic con?
Spanish con-quiz-daters.
Did you hear that cats have carried out a Coup in Barcelona and declared independence from Spain?
They're calling themselves the Republic of Catalo-nya.
I asked my Spanish girlfriend to make a to-do list
so she wrote down everything.
In Spain, you should not develop a program beyond 2.0.
Because that would be over dos.
It wasn't til I studied Spanish as an adult that learned Spain discovered Canada.
As our teacher explained it, the first maps said "Acá, nada."
My son asked today “ Dad, are people in Spain cannibals?”
I answered “Why would you think that?”

He said “Well, my teacher said they mostly live off of tourists there.”
“Is this the Spanish word for ‘nap’?” She asked, pointing to a word on the page.
“Si, está.”
My boss brought bagels for breakfast and asked me which one I wanted. I said "give me one of the Spanish bagels". He responded " One of the Spanish Bagels?"
"Ay poppy."
What do you call a small mosque in Spain?
A mosquito!
People are always amazed by the skilled tattoo artists in Spain
Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision.
What do Spanish phantoms say when they like something?
me ghosta.
How come there are no automatic cars in Spain?
They’re all Manuel.
What milk comes from Spain?
Soy Milk.
Where do folks from Bilbao, Spain buy outdoor equipment?
The Basque Pro Shop.
Which bus went from Spain to America?
Columbus.
I was at my hotel in Spain and wasn't feeling well.
Reception said they had a doctor on staff.

The doctor asked me lots of questions and I was then feeling much better.

I told reception I didn't expect a hotel would have a doctor on staff

They said it was a Spanish Inn Physician
So I asked my Spanish friend if he knew where fish lived.
He said "Si."
Recently, i started learning Spanish
But i can't hola long conversation.
Where to Bees go to party in Spain?
Ibiza.
How do you leave any building in Spain?
You "follow salida lida lida..."
What do Spanish speaking people prefer to travel in groups of 2 or 4?
No tres-passing.
My uncle moved to Spain to sing on stage by night and sell UPVC windows by day. He changed his name to....
Enrique Doubleglazius.
Did you hear about the watchmaker who is half Spanish and half Irish?
His name is Juan O'Clock.