"I heard some dictator wants to move the Earth further from the sun."
"Why??"
"Because it will take longer to make a full revolution."
How much far can you see with your naked eyes, on a clear day? 92,955,807 miles (to the sun).
Why did you guys not laugh at my space puns? Because there way to Sirius.
When God integrated Planet Earth, he didn’t forget his integral calculus lesson.
He remembered to add the sea.
How will you come to know when the moon will go broke? It would happen when moon is down to its last quarter.
The moon asked the sun: Buddy when you are so hot, why are you single yet?
A sun walks into a black hole.
The black hole says to the sun "I don't think you understand the gravity of this situation".
What are the best kind of flowers to get your girlfriend after screwing up?
Whoopsie Daisies
What's E.T. short for?
Because he's got little legs.
My daughter asked me, "Why are the two planets coming close together?"
"Well, you see... When two planets love each other they can come together in holy astro nomy."
Have you heard about the latest restaurant that opened up on moon?
No, how is that restaurant?
Living on Earth might be expensive. But we surely get a free trip around the sun every year!
When you cross summer sun with summer pun you get summer fun.
Those who study the moon for their course or as a habit, are optimists. And that is because they look at the brighter side always.
Why will you not want to give a bath to the Saturn? It would then leave a ring around the tub.
When should astronauts retire?
When they start spacing out.
It is difficult to hold up a trouser. How does Jupiter does it? Simply, with an asteroid belt.
What do you call a fashionable, but judgmental monster who howls at the moon?
A What Not To Wear-Wolf.
Why don't aliens get hungry after being blasted into space?
Because they've just had a big launch.
Mooning is very ASStrological
Why should the Sun get into a school? To get brighter.
Why don't pets make good astronauts?
They're afraid of the spay station
When astronauts die, the local papers run an orbituary.
Are Earth and Moon good friends? Yes, they’ve been going around together for many years now.
What is suns favorite chocolate bar?
A milky way.
How does the sun say hi to the moon?
With a heat wave!
I've finally started to believe that Pluto is not really a planet...
Especially when I saw him in a cartoon.
How does a Man cut his hair on the moon? Eclipse it.
Why doesn’t the sun go to college? Because it has a million degrees!
What does someone mean by a light year? The same as a regular year, but with less calories and fat.
Why is the moon a wanted criminal?
It’s constantly mooning people.
What do aliens prefer to drink?
Gravi-tea.
What do you call an alien with three eyes?
An aliiien.
What do you call a person really crazy about the moon
A lunatic.
Two astronauts who were dating, met up for a launch date.
There’s a lot of proposals on cleaning up space in earth’s orbit from broken satellites.
Looks like they’ll need a vacuum cleaner.
What did the astronaut cook for lunch? An unidentifiable frying object.
How does the moon cut his hair?
Eclipse it.
Why do astronauts use linux?
because you can't open windows in space.
What will a space turkey say to another one? Hubble Hubble.
What kind of light goes around the earth? A Satel-lite.
What do you think holds the moon up? Moonbeams.
Why does no one trust the man on the moon?Why does no one trust the man on the moon?
Because he has a dark side!
Mountains aren't just funny.
They're hill areas.
Do you know what is the favorite key of the astronauts?
The Spacebar.
What is an astronaut's favorite candy bar?
Milky way.
What various kinds of fishes live in space? Starfish.
What is a lightyear?
The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
What does Earth get on Earth day ?
A birthday quake !
If an astronaut steps on chewing gum then what will happen to him? He will simply be stuck on the Orbit.