You might be able to use a smuggled cell phone in prison.
You just have to have cell coverage.
Apple is announcing a new cell phone for children.
iKid you not.
What happens when you cross an iron with a telephone? You get a smooth signal.
I asked my son to go get me a phone book. He laughed, called me a dinosaur, and handed me his iPhone.
The spider is dead, the iPhone screen is cracked, and my son is furious!
My mobile phone has a tuneless ring tone. It's chordless.
What do a phone and an engaged girl have in common? They both have rings.
I fell asleep on my phone the other day. It downloaded a nap.
Wel'l Wel'l Wel'l - if it isn't autocorrect.
I named my phone "The Titanic" because it's always syncing.
You know you're texting too much when...
you try to text, but you're on a landline!
My husband asked me to sync his phone. So I threw it in the sea - not sure why he is upset.
How come an owl turns his cell phone off at night? So he doesn't get any hooty calls.
I like to write jokes down and store them on my phone, so that I can tell them to him later.
I call it my Dad-abase.
Where do phones like to travel?
To the Great Call of China!
Why did the telecommuter quit her job? Because talk is cheap.
What do you call a fake Nokia? A phone-y of course.
What happens if you cross a night crawler with a telephone? You get Ringworm!
What kind of phone does a burglar use?
A no-key-a.
I deleted all my German friends from my cell phone contact list.
Now I'm Hanns free.
What did the therapist say to the angry client when their cell phone battery died?
I suggest you find an outlet!
I was on the phone with my wife and said, "I'm almost home, honey, please put the coffee maker on." After a twenty-second pause, I asked, "You still there, sweetheart?"
"Yeah," she replied. "But I don't think the coffee maker wants to talk right now"
Did you hear about the cell phone that got arrested?
It was charged with battery.
What is a phone's favorite TV show? Game of Phones.
What do you call a loud conversation? A megaphone.
What did the thrifty man say when he got his phone bill? "Who says talk is cheap?"
Why did a pirate leave the boat to get his forgotten cell phone? Booty calls.
What group of people always had the highest cell phone bills?
The Romans.
Why does Mr. Potato need a cell phone? Incase Mr. Onion Rings.
What did the girl say when she got a fake call? "I think that call was phoney".
I got a new cell phone for my wife...
Pretty awesome trade if you ask me!
My cell phone got drunk.
It took too many screenshots.
Why don't skeletons have a mobile? They don't have any body to talk to.
How did Sam win the talent show? Sam-sung.
Why did the hobbit set his cell phone to vibrate?
He was afraid the ring would give him away.
I almost got in trouble because I tried to talk to someone in the same room as me over the phone...
...It was a close call.
Why don't birds make cell phone calls? They might accidentally wing the wrong number.
I swear I was born in the wrong generation. Nowadays everyone is addicted to their phones.
I wish I was born in the 80's when everyone was addicted to Cocaine.
How does the cell phone call his girlfriend on Valentine's Day? He gives her a ring.
How can someone tell if a bee is on their phone? They'll get a buzzy signal.
Did you hear about the monkeys who shared an Amazon account?
They were Prime mates!
Just received Areal Flood Advisory notification on my phone
I should hope it's a real one, the fake ones are just annoying.
I phoned OK magazine the other day. They answered and said "Hello?", so I said "Sorry, wrong number," and hung up.
How did the mobile phone propose to his girlfriend?
He gave her a ring
You didn't hear the joke about cell phones?
Probably because it had a bad reception.
My son accidentally smashed his foot on the table and as he was hopping around the room screaming in pain, I rushed to the phone, picked it up and asked him, "Do you want me to call..."
"...a TOE TRUCK!!??"
I want to tell you one more painful phone pun but I decided it's uncalled for.