My son accidentally smashed his foot on the table and as he was hopping around the room screaming in pain, I rushed to the phone, picked it up and asked him, "Do you want me to call..."
"...a TOE TRUCK!!??"
What is a phone's favorite TV show? Game of Phones.
What group of people always had the highest cell phone bills?
The Romans.
You know you're texting too much when...
you try to text, but you're on a landline!
I like to write jokes down and store them on my phone, so that I can tell them to him later.
I call it my Dad-abase.
4G, or not 4G, that is the question.
I fell asleep on my phone the other day. It downloaded a nap.
My wife and I got married under a cell phone tower.
The ceremony wasn't great, but the reception was perfect.
How did Sam win the talent show? Sam-sung.
What brand of hand soap do telephone operators use? Dial.
Why did the hobbit set his cell phone to vibrate?
He was afraid the ring would give him away.
I would not be able to picture myself without having a camera phone.
How does a pirate communicate? With his aye phone.
Since getting sober, I decided to go with the cheapest cell phone provider I can find!
Way fewer bars!!!
What kind of phone does a burglar use?
A no-key-a.
My mobile phone has a tuneless ring tone. It's chordless.