What happened to the girl's phone when she was getting a perm done? She got a frizzy signal.
What did the thrifty man say when he got his phone bill? "Who says talk is cheap?"
Apple is announcing a new cell phone for children.
iKid you not.
I almost had a predicament trying to call someone in the same room as me. It was a close call.
Why did the telecommuter quit her job? Because talk is cheap.
My dad enjoys writing jokes and storing them on my phone. He calls it his Dad-a-base.
Autocorrect has become my worst enema.
How come the mummy doesn't want a telephone? Because he always gets too wrapped up on his calls.
Why did the hobbit set his cell phone to vibrate?
He was afraid the ring would give him away.
I did it! Dad said to save my money til my balance looks like a phone number.....
Available balance: $9.11.
What do you call a fake Nokia? A phone-y of course.
I got a new cell phone for my wife...
Pretty awesome trade if you ask me!
Cell phones are a static symbol.
Wel'l Wel'l Wel'l - if it isn't autocorrect.
What brand of hand soap do telephone operators use? Dial.
I want to tell you one more painful phone pun but I decided it's uncalled for.
How did Sam win the talent show? Sam-sung.
My mobile phone has a tuneless ring tone. It's chordless.
How did the mobile phone propose to his girlfriend?
He gave her a ring
I swear I was born in the wrong generation. Nowadays everyone is addicted to their phones.
I wish I was born in the 80's when everyone was addicted to Cocaine.
How can someone tell if a bee is on their phone? They'll get a buzzy signal.
I was testing the speaker phone on the intercom on our landline with my father yesterday.
It started to make that annoying noise. My old man said it was too close to call.
My husband asked me to sync his phone. So I threw it in the sea - not sure why he is upset.
What is a phone's favorite TV show? Game of Phones.
Why don't skeletons have a mobile? They don't have any body to talk to.
Why is it so hard to contact a pirate? He leaves his phone off the hooks.
Mobile phones have been around longer than people think.
I was watching this film the other day and heard Sir Lancelot ask someone to fetch his charger.
My cell phone got drunk.
It took too many screenshots.
What did the phone say to begin the race?
On your marks, handset, go!
Someone just called my phone, sneezed and then just hung up.
I am getting sick and tired of these cold calls.
What did the girl say when she got a fake call? "I think that call was phoney".
4G, or not 4G, that is the question.
I was on the phone with my wife and said, "I'm almost home, honey, please put the coffee maker on." After a twenty-second pause, I asked, "You still there, sweetheart?"
"Yeah," she replied. "But I don't think the coffee maker wants to talk right now"
What do a phone and an engaged girl have in common? They both have rings.
Just received Areal Flood Advisory notification on my phone
I should hope it's a real one, the fake ones are just annoying.
I phoned OK magazine the other day. They answered and said "Hello?", so I said "Sorry, wrong number," and hung up.
I would not be able to picture myself without having a camera phone.
How does a pirate communicate? With his aye phone.
How does the cell phone call his girlfriend on Valentine's Day? He gives her a ring.
I almost got in trouble because I tried to talk to someone in the same room as me over the phone...
...It was a close call.
The umpire kept answering his phone during the softball game.
He said he didn't want to miss any calls.
Since getting sober, I decided to go with the cheapest cell phone provider I can find!
Way fewer bars!!!
I asked my son to go get me a phone book. He laughed, called me a dinosaur, and handed me his iPhone.
The spider is dead, the iPhone screen is cracked, and my son is furious!
You might be able to use a smuggled cell phone in prison.
You just have to have cell coverage.
I deleted all my German friends from my cell phone contact list.
Now I'm Hanns free.
What do you call a bald spot on a cell phone salesperson?
A gap in coverage.
You know you're texting too much when...
you try to text, but you're on a landline!
How come an owl turns his cell phone off at night? So he doesn't get any hooty calls.
You didn't hear the joke about cell phones?
Probably because it had a bad reception.
Did you hear about the cell phone that got arrested?
It was charged with battery.