Now I know why people love footballers – especially the goalies, they are real keepers.
What shape is a kiss?
A-lip-tickle.
Being in love is a lot like central heating in your home.
You turn it on just before your guests come over and pretend that your house is always like this.
Why did Larry the lizard leave his lover longing?
he had ... a reptile dysfunction
I used to love puns about throwing things, but now I don’t.
It was just a fling.
Sloths never kiss on the first date, they take it slow.
While cuddling my girlfriend, I whispered "Honey, this isn't working out for me."
Then I rolled off the bed and started doing push-ups. "This is working out for me!"
The cat’s out of the bag – I love you purry much.
I love you and I ain’t lion.
Never laugh at your spouse’s choice… You’re one of them.
What do you get if your lovers soul was trapped in a sword for all eternity?
A babe-blade.
How do you get a teddy bear across the border?
You snuggle it across.
Did you hear Harry’s girlfriend left him for Keith?
Yeah, she was always telling the poor guy to Harry up, turns out she found someone who could Keith better.
My counselor gave me a hug today
I guess I got shrinkwrapped
Owl always love you.
What did the patient with the broken leg say to their doctor?
Hey doc, I have a crutch on you.
I love you berry much.
You’re udder-ly perfect.
You make miso happy.
I always find artists romantic because when they love you, they do it with all their art.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive you! and I want the whole world to know it.
I love you from my head tomatoes.
You’re turtle-ly awesome.
We are mint to be.
Why is it always easy for vampires to find their better halves?
Because it’s always love at first bite.
I get a real kick out of you.
What did the fruit lover say after he met a girl?
I’ve got a date
What did the lipstick say after he let down his friend?
I’ll make it up to you.
I’m soy
into you.
What did the painter say to his wife? "I love you with all my art!"
How long have I loved you? I’ve lost track.
I think you’re incredi-bowl.
Wow, wouldn’t mind if you became my significant otter.
You are in my heart, my mind, and in my entire body.
In fact, my doctor says that you must be a parasite!
My son fell asleep last night with the TV clicker in his hand.
He’s really embraced remote learning.
You're one in a melon.
How do flowers kiss?
With their tulips
I like to crouch down, hug my knees and lean forward.
That's just how I roll
I started dating her when she backed her car into mine at the mall.
I guess you could say we totally met by accident.
Sorry if this is extra cheesy, but you have a pizza my heart.
I always have a souper time with you.
What’s it like to kiss a vampire?
A real pain in the neck!
What did the lighter color shade tell to its dark lover?
I want hue
"I think you should embrace the change, son"
Said my father as he handed me a handful of coins.
Why do painters always fall for their models?
Because they love them with all of their art.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Olive.
Olive, who?
Olive you, and I don’t care who knows it!
I love you with all my butt.
I would say my heart, but it is just not as big. (wink wink where my curvy booties at?!)
Why were the melon lovers sad?
Because they cantaloupe.
Why do accountants make good lovers?
They're great with figures.
Or maybe it’s baseball players because they’re so great at hitting it off.
I love spending koala-ty time with you.