I'm moving some couches today...
Sofa, so good!
What did the first plate say to the second plate?
"Dinner's on me!"
How many drum sets can you store on a sofa?
One per cushion
Why does a milking chair only have three legs?
The cow has the udder.
How do you get into an all glass China cabinet?
Sorry, that's glassified.
Why was the cabinet maker fired on his first day?
He just couldn't get a handle on it.
How do you move a piece of furniture at the weather station?
With four casters.
When I heard my sofa had been stolen, I thought “I’m not going to take this sitting down”.
Two cabinets walk out of a bar...
One says to the other, "you walking home?" and the other replies, "Nah, I'm cabinet."
I was going to replace the seats at my bar
But... I just can't look at another stool sample