Country Puns

Welcome to the Geographic Humor of country puns!

Country Puns

My son asked me, what’s a Greek urn?
I said, “about 20 drachmas a day.”
Why is the French Prime Minister never seen in the morning?
Becasue he is pm not am!
Did you hear of the new disease going through France?
I've heard it was a Paris-ite.
I'll be making a movie about the Greek alphabets.
It's a Psi Phi film.
Can a fencing champion born in France, but raised in the U.S. represent either country in the olympics?
Yes. Because they have duel citizenship.
French fries aren’t cooked in France
They’re cooked in greece.
Which ancient Greek Philosopher had a foot fetish?
Play-toe.
Or was it Sock-rates?
What do they call the Hunger Games in France?
Battle Royale with Cheese.
My son asked me what Micheal Jackson was doing in Italy
I told him he was "sight-heeheeing."
I was at my hotel in Spain and wasn't feeling well.
Reception said they had a doctor on staff.

The doctor asked me lots of questions and I was then feeling much better.

I told reception I didn't expect a hotel would have a doctor on staff

They said it was a Spanish Inn Physician
Which is the coolest football team in Italy?
AC Milan.
Me and my friend were going to a costume party. He told me he was coming as a small island off the coast of Italy.
I said don’t be Sicily.
"There's a woman trapped under a motorway bridge in Italy."
"Genoa?"
"I'm not sure, I can't see her face."
What is the most popular flower in France?
Croissanthemums.
How did citizens of Ancient Greece measure land for crops?
By Demeter.
A lot of William Shakespeare’s plays were based off of old Greek and Roman performances
That's playgarism if you ask me.
What's the difference between Greek yogurt and regular yogurt?
Greek yogurt has a rich cultural history.
When I went to highschool in Italy my classmates were one year older than me.
I Skipped pasta grade.
The Leaning Tower of Pisa is in Italy
So it’s italicized!
In Spain, you should not develop a program beyond 2.0.
Because that would be over dos.
What do you call a 1 cent coin in Italy?
A penne.
So in my trip to Spain i got attacked by a bull.
Oh man that's spainful.
Why does it take so long for the EU to figure out how much Italy owes them every year?
Hey, ease up. Rome wasn't billed in a day.
Did you know the first French fries weren't actually cooked in France? They were cooked in Greece.
What does a frog in Paris eat?
French Flies.
What did Sophocles call his dating service in Ancient Greece?

Oedipal Arrangements.
So I went to France and bought a house made of bread
I guess you could say I'm living in pain.
What will you call two quizzers having a date in spain comic con?
Spanish con-quiz-daters.
I checked my phone bill after my trip to Italy, and it said I spent DCXII dollars.
I must have left on Data Roman.
When in France, I have Nantes-thing to complain about.
It’s lonely between Germany and Spain
Not many France, nobody’s Nice to me, everyone seems to be Lyon. It’s just Eiffel.
In Italy there is a group pf moms creating soft cheese...
They brand themselves as MOMzarella.
Where to Bees go to party in Spain?
Ibiza.
I always feel like a winner in France, which is great because I hate Toulouse.
Which bus went from Spain to America?
Columbus.
What do you call a Greek philosopher who loves rice?
Arisotto.
Another cheese factory in France exploded...
I Camembert to hear this joke again!
Have you seen the Greek book that became a movie? You odyssey it.
Why should you never eat the fish in France?
Because it's poisson.
Don’t come to France without any Monet.
Why do people in Greece not wake up until noon?
Because Dawn is tough on greece.
If you were born and raised in France, what does that make you?
French bred.
What do you call a sneezing big foot in Spanish?
Achoopacabra.
What did France, Great Britain, and their allies say after The Great War?
World War Won.
‪This is the first year I’m not going to Italy because of the coronavirus. ‬ ‪
Normally I don’t go because I’m poor‬.
I love a good shindig. Just call me Napoleon Bonapart-y.
What's the name of the machine the ancient greeks used to calculate how best to fight hybrid monsters?
The antichimera mechanism.
Did you know that the Greek god Chronos was in the Mafia?
He was the Don of Time itself!
What do you call a hangover when you're alone in Spain?
Barf-a-lona.
I used to be a personal driver in France
But now I have nothing to chauffeur it.