My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer.
I'm not too worried, I think she's jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf.
My keyboard fell apart today.
I feel like I'm losing Ctrl of everything.
Where do computers go to dance?
The disk-O.
I wanted to do some research on organs in biology, but I had no WiFi and couldn't find the information I wanted.
I wound up using cellular.
Q. Why couldn't the dinosaur play games on the computer?
A. Because he ate the mous
I hate it when planes don't have free WiFi.
It drives me bored air line crazy.
Why did the computer leave the restroom crying?
It said, "it hurts when IP."
Clean water is like password
Not everyone has access to it.
Why can't you use beef stew as a password?
Because it's not stroganoff.
I was testing the speaker phone on the intercom on our landline with my father yesterday.
It started to make that annoying noise. My old man said it was too close to call.
If you used a keyboard with built-in speakers, you would be...?
Stereotyping.
People need to be careful about computers at all times because they byte.
How many wipes does it take to clean a keyboard?
qwsedrftgyhujikolpawesdrtfgyhujikloaszxdcrfvgtbhnjmk,lazsxdcfvgsedtfrgyftg67y78u87u8uii9op[;'';;'/;l/l;.l.k,lkmjkmertyudfghjk12q21q2qw3qwe3we4r45rt6ygerdgfvbwedfcv qwedfscv
I now pronounce you husband and wifi
You may kiss the bride goodbye.
Playing the keyboard is...
my type of music.
Dear keyboard manufacturers, I'm writing to request a redesign so that g and t wouldn't be right next to each other. Retards
I went into a bar with a keyboard under my arm. The barman said "Oi! We don"t want your typing in here".
The shark and the computer are so alike. They both have and use their megabytes.
Why are boy keyboards scared of girl keyboards?
They don't want to get qwerties.
Why did the hard drive crash?
Because it had a bad driver.
When my father complained to my mother for never picking or dropping me at school, she looked at him and said, "You are the master of drag and drop, my love". He's an IT specialist...
Why are wooden hard drives so bad?
They're all bark and no byte.
What do Russians call a bad WiFi connection?
Inter-NIET
'what's the Wifi password?'
'Its for security'
'Haha, yes, I know that. But what's the password?'.
'No, it's 'forsecurity'. All one word, lower case.'.
Up until now, I always thought that all the cool mice would get together and live in my mousepad. Now when I know the truth, I feel quite broken.
My computer wants to build a snowman.
It's frozen.
My wife asked: "What's our WiFi?"
I said: It's an internet connection that works wirelessly through something called a modem. Why?"
She hasn't spoken to me all week.
I'm really obsessed with the F1 key on my keyboard. I'm trying to get help.
Why did the man get so sad his computer had a virus?
It was a terminal illness.
Why was the IT guy in the hospital?
He touched the firewall.
Two days ago, I named my Wifi to "Hack it if you can".
Yesterday it was changed to "Challenge accepted".
Today I Learned I should NOT have my password be the name of my cat.
I then turned to my cat and said, "Well, wJ:cg/v&A;6BTt, I guess it's back to the drawing board."
I hate hard drives...
...they byte
What do you do if you spill maple syrup all over your keyboard?
Just turn off sticky keys.
Why did the spider get on the computer?
To check his website.
Don't use the word "EGG" for your password...
It's very easily cracked.
What's the tastiest part of a floppy disk?
The cookie!
I asked the bartender for the WiFi password but he told me to buy a drink first. So I ordered a Moscow Mule and asked him again. He handed me a card with the password. It said:
"Buy a drink first" ... no spaces, all lowercase."
Q. What happened when the computer geeks met?
A. It was love at first site!
I introduced my mouse to my keyboard today...
It was awkward at first, but then they just clicked.
IF YOU GUYS SEE A LINK ON FACEBOOK THAT SAYS "GET A MILLION DOLLARS FOR FREE" DON'T CLICK ON IT.
IT IS A VIRUS THAT PUTS YOUR PHONE'S KEYBOARD ON CAPS LOCK.
I for one
is something you might do if you had a broken keyboard
What happened to the plane run by a computer?
It crashed.
Q. Why can't computers play tennis?
A. They try to surf the net.
My sister's laptop is so sassy and fun, it loves to play disc-o music.
V
V
Edit*: sorry it seems as the CTRL button on my keyboard isn't working
Hey baby, are you a cloud server?
Because I have something to upload from my hard drive.
My computer's favorite singer is A Dell.
So, if I heat my solid state hard drive until it becomes a gaseous state hard drive
Would that mean I'm doing cloud computing?
I was dating a keyboard but we had to break up...
...she just wasn't my type.