Hey, Baby do you want to see what tricks my treat could do?
With all this talk of Corona Virus, the people who make sanitising gel are rubbing their hands together.
Why did the vampire get a COVID test?
Because he was COFFIN.
What do Muslims do during the coronavirus outbreak?
They stay in Quran-tine.
Which Pokémon has Covid?
Pik-achoo.
Don't worry, the Corona Virus won't last long... It was made in China.
I was going to make a joke about losing your senses due to COVID.
But I decided it was poor taste.
People with 20-20 vision..
Why you didn't warn us before??
Nice pumpkins!
Did you know there are 206 bones in the human body? Would you mind one more?
That mask is becoming on you. If it were me, I’d be coming too.
I got really good at telling them, so I’m being crowned the king of corona virus puns.
You’re all formally invited to attend my coronation.
This Corona virus is a blessing
My wife doesn't want to travel anywhere.
She no longer buys anything online, since everything comes from China.
she doesn't go to the mall to avoid the crowds.
she spends all of her time in a mask with her mouth closed.
Best thing that has ever happened to me.
I'm using a bra for a face mask.
I like to keep abreast of corona security measures.
My teen daughter was sent home from school for covid exposure.....
She’s now my quaranteen.
I've taken up online yoga since the COVID-19 outbreak started.
It helps me namaste at home.
With all this spare time on their hands people are going to start pursuing their passions. I wouldn't be surprised to sudden explosion in the arts, a renewal in scientific interest, and a mass proliferation of original content.
A coronaissance, if you will.
I just asked the wife to get into her nurse's uniform.
She said "Why? Are you feeling horny?"
"No we need bread!"
My daughter told me COVID stinks and she misses her teacher...
I told her "I Ms. your teacher too."
I got my COVID-19 vaccine from a "doctor" who approached me in a downtown alley after midnight, offering it for $50 cash.
It was a shot in the dark, but I took it.
Who is running the corona virus relief?
WHO??
Girl, are you the Wuhan Corona Virus?
Because you’re taking my breath away.
If Corona virus is just a beer virus..
Then it’s just a yeast infection!
I would totally carve your pumpkin.
Tom Hanks just got the Corona virus.
They had to lock the whole Cast Away.
Has Covid-19 forced you to wear glasses and a mask at the same time?
You may be entitled to condensation.
We are 11 days into self-isolation ands it is really upsetting me to witness my wife standing at the living room window gazing aimlessly into space with tears running down her cheeks.
Don’t get me wrong, I empathize with her. I’ve considered letting her in many times, but rules are rules.
There’s no trick in these pants.
A man walks into a bar and goes up to the bartender and says "I'll have a Corona please, hold the virus."
They found a plant that cures COVID-19!
It’s called plant yourself on the couch.
Me: I'll have a Corona please.
Waiter: *Cough*
Me: Thank you.
I'm tired of this old broom. Got anything else I can ride?
I wanna bob for your apples.
I’m no vampire but I’m fine with getting no sleep and biting your neck all night.
What's the difference between butter and the corona virus?
Corona actually spreads.
Girl, you make my crotch rise from the dead
Please stop with all the corona jokes.
I‘m sick of it.
Are you dressed up as a tree? Cause you’re giving me wood.
With Coronavirus and our impending doom, I guess no one really had 2020 vision after all.
I really hope Santa can figure out how to make all his deliveries this year due to Covid-19......
I hear he just ran out of santa-tizer.
Did you hear the new pop song about Covid?
...it's pretty catchy.
Is that a magic wand in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
People with a cold - "I just want to stay in bed and do nothing, I feel terrible."
People with Corona Virus - "I feel terrible, I think I will go skiing in Austria, visit the Eiffel Tower and maybe do some white water rafting in Camino de Santiago."
Dolly Parton partially funded Moderna's COVID Vaccine.
It comes in two very large dosey-doses.
What's the difference between Wuhan and Las Vegas?
What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.
What movie perfectly describes the corona virus?
No country for old men.
Hey, my parents are out of town. That means we have the haunted mansion all to ourselves.
You know why women's eyes are so noticeable these days?
It's the mask era.
Why don’t we go somewhere where I can stick a candle in your jack-o-lantern?
What does a person with Covid like to drink?
Coughy.
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