What do you call a Viking who is really good at basketball?
a Vallhalla Balla.
Where does a Viking keep their baby?
In the Norsery."
What kind of car does a viking drive?
A fjord
Did the Vikings believe in reincarnation?
That's a re-Thorical question.
When the Vikings discovered America, what did they name it?
Norse America.
Where do Vikings go when they get old?
The Norsing home.
Why did the teacher use the evolution of Thor in viking mythology to teach both literature and Northern European history in her class?
She wanted to demonstrate using a Meta-Thor.
What did the Viking boss say to his band of misbehaving marauders?
It's either my way or Norway!
What do you call a weary Viking conqueror?
Bluetooth low energy
What stories did Vikings tell their children?
Norsery Rhymes
Was Henry VI a ViKing?
Did you hear about the Viking who was reincarnated?
He was Bjorn again.
What do you tell the nobles of Scandinavia whenever you're leaving their house?
Viking.
What do you call a Swedish cycling group?
Viking Biking
The Vikings had an initiative tradition where a child had to participate in a raid to become a full man
... as they say, it takes a pillage to raise a child.
What is the most popular console with the vikings?
The axe-box
What did Dead Viking say to Voluptuous Valkyrie?
Valhallo there.
What do you call a vegetarian Viking?
Norvegan.
When a ship or Vikings suddenly vanishes
There's a disturbance in the Norse
Why are Scandinavian women so hot?
The Vikings didn't bring back the ugly ones.
A viking adds symbols to an axe he has just made ...
" Oh no iv runed it"
What is a Viking's favorite music?
Ragnarock.
What do you call a viking who is attracted to both genders?
Biking
How do Vikings get each other's attention?
They ValHolla!
Why were the Vikings such good sailors?
You can lead a Norse to water but you can't make him sink.
What do Vikings call the people that cut their hair?
Barberians.
Norwegian archeologists have uncovered the very first Viking parenting book.
The title, translated into modern language, is *It Takes a Pillage*.
What's the difference between a Viking and that one Bond movie where he's in space?
One's *Moonraker*, the other's a rune maker.
What does a Muslim Viking say at the movie theater?
Valhalla Snackbar!
Why was the viking boxer loved so much
He ragna"rocked" the house
It might take a village to raise a child...
but it only takes a viking to raze a village.
What do you call a viking cemetary?
A grey fjord.
How can you tell if you're at a classy Viking restaurant?
They have Valhallet parking
Where do Viking warrior scrabble champions go when they die?
Vowel-halla
What does vikings call english villages?
Chopping centers.
Why can't Vikings fans eat cereal? Because they choke before they ever reach the bowl.
What are the Vikings favorite drink?
Mini Sodas
What is a Vikings favourite letter?
Well obviously it's the C!
What do you call a Viking cat call?
Valholla
Did you hear about the viking cannibal?
He had a Swede-tooth.
How does a Viking show the amount of raiding and pillaging that they do at the same time?
They use a Sven Diagram.
What do you call a Viking who's been bitten by a vampire?
Norseferatu.
Where did the Viking buy his guitar?
Nordstrom's
Who succeeded the Vikings?
The Z-kings
A Viking walked into a bar.
The bartender asked, Why the long ship?
What do you call a Viking soldier's trusty steed?
A horse in the force of the Norse, of course.
My girlfriend said if I don't stop my obsession with Viking culture she'll fight me to the death.
"Jokes on you," I said. "If I die in battle, I'll go straight to Valhalla."
The Vikings had an initiative tradition where a child had to participate in a raid to become a full man.
As they say, it takes a pillage to raise a child.
Did you hear about the viking who hit his thumb with a hammer and bit his tongue?
It was Thor.
What did the Viking chieftain say when asked about his motivation?
"I'm in it for the longhall."