Why was the viking boxer loved so much
He ragna"rocked" the house
When the Vikings discovered America, what did they name it?
Norse America.
What are the Vikings favorite drink?
Mini Sodas
What do you call a Viking soldier's trusty steed?
A horse in the force of the Norse, of course.
Vikings weren't exactly the best at drinking contests.
They were quite MEADiocre.
How does a Viking show the amount of raiding and pillaging that they do at the same time?
They use a Sven Diagram.
Did you hear about the viking cannibal?
He had a Swede-tooth.
How was the viking party?
Pretty Loki.
Norwegian archeologists have uncovered the very first Viking parenting book.
The title, translated into modern language, is *It Takes a Pillage*.
The Vikings had an initiative tradition where a child had to participate in a raid to become a full man.
As they say, it takes a pillage to raise a child.
Why did the Viking buy an old boat?
He couldn't a fjord a new one.
Vikings aren't afraid of death.
They know they'll be Bjorn again.
What do you call a weary Viking conqueror?
Bluetooth low energy
What stories did Vikings tell their children?
Norsery Rhymes
Why did the Vikings not have high doorknobs?
Because of Loki.
Wanna hear a joke about Vikings?
Never mind, there's Norway you'd laugh at it.
Don't send our invitations to a viking themed wedding until the date is set in stone
Or they'll be runed
What did the Viking boss say to his band of misbehaving marauders?
It's either my way or Norway!
How can you tell if you're at a classy Viking restaurant?
They have Valhallet parking
What did the Viking chieftain say when asked about his motivation?
"I'm in it for the longhall."
My girlfriend said if I don't stop my obsession with Viking culture she'll fight me to the death.
"Jokes on you," I said. "If I die in battle, I'll go straight to Valhalla."
What do you call a Viking who's been bitten by a vampire?
Norseferatu.
What does a Muslim Viking say at the movie theater?
Valhalla Snackbar!
A Viking walked into a bar.
The bartender asked, Why the long ship?
What does vikings call english villages?
Chopping centers.
Why do vikings have barcodes on their ships?
Its so they can scan-de-navien
Did the Vikings believe in reincarnation?
That's a re-Thorical question.
What do you call a group of penniless Viking grave diggers?
The poor norsemen of the necropolis.
Why do companies all around the world fear Vikings?
Because of their skills in hacking
Why can't Vikings fans eat cereal? Because they choke before they ever reach the bowl.
Old Norse cuisine is simply not to my Viking.
What do you call a Viking who is really good at basketball?
a Vallhalla Balla.
My friends and I are starting a disco group.
We'll dress as a Viking, a Mongol, a Caribbean pirate, a Bedouin raider, and a Spanish conquistador.
We call ourselves: The Pillage People.
What do you call a viking cemetary?
A grey fjord.
Where do southern Viking descendants go after death?
Y'allhalla.
What did a viking said to the other after a dad joke?
Aesir what you did there.
What do you call a viking who is attracted to both genders?
Biking
Who succeeded the Vikings?
The Z-kings
A viking adds symbols to an axe he has just made ...
" Oh no iv runed it"
What is a Vikings favourite letter?
Well obviously it's the C!
What's a Vikings favourite dance?
The Loki cokey.
What do Vikings call the people that cut their hair?
Barberians.
Why were the Vikings such good sailors?
You can lead a Norse to water but you can't make him sink.
Did you hear about the viking who hit his thumb with a hammer and bit his tongue?
It was Thor.
A man goes into a Chinese restaurant and sees people dressed like vikings
"Excuse me, ladies and gentleman. I am a well traveled man and the atmosphere of my excursions must be perfect. I must kindly ask you to leave."
A big, muscular man dressed in Viking armor walked up to the man and said
"Norway"
Roman soldiers are trained.
But Vikings are Bjorn.
Vikings joke
Why do West Virginia residences love the Vikings?
They catch theilens from their cousins.
Why did the teacher use the evolution of Thor in viking mythology to teach both literature and Northern European history in her class?
She wanted to demonstrate using a Meta-Thor.
What is the most popular console with the vikings?
The axe-box
Why did the Vikings sail to England in longboats?
It was too far to swim!