Ups Jokes

"Look, our relationship is like doing push ups on your knees. It's just not working out"
What's the best way to force a male to do sit ups? Put the remote control between his toes.
Would you sit on my feet while I do push ups?
Little Johnny Buys a Horse
Little Johnny attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse's legs and rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Johnny asked, "Dad, why are you doing that?" His father replied, "Because when I'm buying horses, I have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy. Johnny, looking worried, said, "Dad, I think the UPS guy wants to buy Mom."
I tried riding a camel instead of a horse once.
It had its ups and downs.
Why did the telecommuter lose his job? He had to many hang ups.