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Now Jokes

Spotify Pick Up Lines
Is Spotify down? Well the music in my house is now up. Wanna come by and listen to records?
Yard Puns
I really wish my five-year-old son would make up his mind! First, he said he wanted a treehouse in the backyard, but now, he says he doesn't need it…
Took me twenty years to grow that thing!
Food Quotes
“Stomach: I will now demonstrate a blue whale’s mating call.”
― Unknown
“All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt.”
― Charles M. Schulz
“Red meat is not bad for you. Now, blue-green meat—that’s bad for you!”
— Tom Smothers
"All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt."
— Charles M. Shulz
Space Pick Up Lines
Girl, you must be blue because you’re the hottest star around right now.
Funny Groucho Marx Quotes
"Well, Art is Art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water. And east is east and west is west and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does. Now you tell me what you know."
The Beatles Pick Up Lines
Even The Beatles think that we should "Come Together." "Right now."
Garden Puns
Schwarzenegger retired from TV to kill bugs. Now he’s an ex-terminator.
Classic Pick Up Lines
One night I looked up at the stars and thought, ‘Wow, how beautiful.’ But now that I’m looking at you, nothing else can compare.
Are You Pick Up Lines
Are you a fruit, because Honeydew you know how fine you look right now?
Tableware Puns
I was looking forward to eat my rice bowl.
But my brother, like always, ate them. And now he's experiencing really bad headaches.

I guess it's because he has a history of having my-grains.
Halloween Pick Up Lines
If you think I’m hot now, wait until you see what I turn into at midnight.
Funny Health Quotes
"Red meat is not bad for you. Now blue-green meat, that's bad for you!" - Tommy Smothers