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Material Jokes

Little Johnny and the Science Question
A science teacher asked her students "Children, if you could own one material, what would it be? One girl said, "I would choose gold. It’s worth lots of money and I could buy a Corvette." One boy said, "I would want platinum because it’s worth more than gold and I could buy a Porsche." The teacher said, "Little Johnny, What would you want?" Johnny said, "I would want silicone." "Why would you want silicone?" Asked the teacher "Well my mom got some, he replied, “and there's always a Porsche or Corvette sitting in our driveway.”
Cheesy Pick Up Lines
Hey girl, feel my sweater. Know what it's made of?
Boyfriend material.
Valentines Day Puns
Your shirt must be made out of husband material.
Your sweater must be made out of wife material.
Classic Pick Up Lines
Do you know what my shirt is made of? Husband material.
Geology Puns
Why do Earth Science professors like to teach about ammonia?
Because it's basic material.
Travel Pick Up Lines
Hey girl. Feel my sweater. Know what it’s made of? Husband material.
Clothes Pick Up Lines
Feel my shirt. Know what it’s made of? Wifey material.
Do you know what my shirt is made of? Boyfriend material!
Rock Puns
Why do earth science professors always talk about ammonia? Because it’s basic material.
How to Return a Shirt
I went with a friend to buy a grey cotton sweatshirt. I bought one but when I got home I noticed a little rip in the left sleeve. I showed it to my friend who encouraged me to return it. Would you believe, when I got to the store, the salesperson said "I'm sorry. This isn't the sweatshirt you purchased. Our records indicate that the sweatshirt you bought was 80% rayon and polyester. We can't take back this cotton one." "I'm afraid you're wrong", said I, smiling at my friend, who had been with me through the whole affair. "I did indeed purchase a cotton sweatshirt." I pointed to my friend. "This is my material witness".