I went into a bar with a keyboard under my arm. The barman said "Oi! We don"t want your typing in here".
I left my job at the keyboard factory today. To be honest, I had been looking for an Escape for a while.
What do you do if you spill maple syrup all over your keyboard?
Just turn off sticky keys.
Someone vandalized my keyboard leaving only 1 button.
Surprisingly, the police were more thorough in the investigation than I expected. They even asked to see my colon.
Why did Karen press Ctrl-Shift-Esc on her keyboard?
Because she wanted to speak to the Task Manager!
I heard that starting next year, keyboards will no longer be sold with italics...
But it was a bold-faced lie.
A good workman doesn't blame his fools
\*tools.
Stupid keyboard.
I for one
is something you might do if you had a broken keyboard
I took all the punctuation marks off of the judge's keyboard.
I expect a long sentence.
My keyboard fell apart today.
I feel like I'm losing Ctrl of everything.
I introduced my mouse to my keyboard today...
It was awkward at first, but then they just clicked.
What's the sketchiest button combo on a computer keyboard?
Shift + T
Playing the keyboard is...
my type of music.
Which keyboard shortcut doesn't work if you're incontinent?
Ctrl-P
Why is the 7 key on the keyboard so afraid?
Because the & is near
Keep Your Friends Close, Your Utility Keys Closer.
Got fired from my job at the keyboard factory. I couldn't keep the space clean.
My wireless keyboard isn't working
I guess I need to re-pair it.
I just lost a key on my keyboard
Now its all out of control.
I want anarchy
Because my keyboard is missing one.
Why did the keyboard not get any sleep?...
Because it has two shifts.
Did you hear about the keyboard that lost it's Period Key?
He was missing the point.
Dear keyboard manufacturers, I'm writing to request a redesign so that g and t wouldn't be right next to each other. Retards
What key on the keyboard is truly out of this world?
The spacebar.
I'm not like other keyboards...
I'm qwerty
What type of blood does a keyboard have?
Typo.
I was dating a keyboard but we had to break up...
...she just wasn't my type.
I always love pressing F5 on my keyboard.
It's so refreshing.
I'm really obsessed with the F1 key on my keyboard. I'm trying to get help.
Today my "O" button on my keyboard stopped working.
Maybe it was a sign I should've stopped o-ppressing the keyboard.
My keyboard is missing a key. I lost ctrl.
What's one of the worst things you could come across while surfing the web?
Your keyboard.
I've got no home, I haven't got control, and I can't see any escape.
I should get a new keyboard.
I left my laptop outside on the picnic table, and when I came back, the keyboard was covered in ants...
...It took a while to herd them together but I finally got them all under control.
What do you call a gushing keyboard?
sqwerty
My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer.
I'm not too worried, I think she's jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf.
On a keyboard, nothing is under control.
What do you call a solar powered keyboard?
A photosynthesiser
If you used a keyboard with built-in speakers, you would be...?
Stereotyping.
I wasn't making enough money as a keyboard percussionist so I started moonlighting as gun salesperson.
I go from glockenspiel to Glock and spiel.
I came into the office early and switched as many M and N keys on keyboards as I could. Some might say I'm a monster...
But others will say nomster
IF YOU GUYS SEE A LINK ON FACEBOOK THAT SAYS "GET A MILLION DOLLARS FOR FREE" DON'T CLICK ON IT.
IT IS A VIRUS THAT PUTS YOUR PHONE'S KEYBOARD ON CAPS LOCK.
Did you hear about the guy who got fired from the Keyboard Factory?
He didn't put enough shifts in.
Where do the keys on a keyboard go to have a good time
The spacebar.
Just can't get away from my broken keyboard. There's no escape.
How do you type the word "Royalty" on a keyboard?
You start with the higher R key.
V
V
Edit*: sorry it seems as the CTRL button on my keyboard isn't working
Why are boy keyboards scared of girl keyboards?
They don't want to get qwerties.
How many wipes does it take to clean a keyboard?
qwsedrftgyhujikolpawesdrtfgyhujikloaszxdcrfvgtbhnjmk,lazsxdcfvgsedtfrgyftg67y78u87u8uii9op[;'';;'/;l/l;.l.k,lkmjkmertyudfghjk12q21q2qw3qwe3we4r45rt6ygerdgfvbwedfcv qwedfscv
I just lost a key on my keyboard
Now its all out of control.