V
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Edit*: sorry it seems as the CTRL button on my keyboard isn't working
If a cat broke your computer...
Would it be that an error has o-purred ?
I hate it when planes don't have free WiFi.
It drives me bored air line crazy.
If you used a keyboard with built-in speakers, you would be...?
Stereotyping.
I couldn't stop laughing when my father warned my brother, saying, "If you hack my Microsoft Office, I will find you, you have my Word".
My email password has been hacked again
That's the third time I've had to rename the cat.
Why did the man get so sad his computer had a virus?
It was a terminal illness.
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.
Just can't get away from my broken keyboard. There's no escape.
Q. Why couldn't the dinosaur play games on the computer?
A. Because he ate the mous
Why was the computer late to work? Because it had a hard drive!
I was conned into believing that my hotel room in Moscow had free Wifi.
I remember the ad saying: Internyet.
Why do you need a password to make a camp fire?
So you can log in.
Why did the computer wear glasses?
To improve its web sight.
What do you call a computer that plays tennis?
A server
I didn't know WiFi stood for Wireless Fidelity.
I guess I just didn't get the connection.
Where do the keys on a keyboard go to have a good time
The spacebar.
How did the computer hackers get away from the scene of crime?
They just ransomware.
Computers cannot make good boxers because their bark is worse than their byte.
How big is a clown's hard drive?
50 GiggleBytes
I dropped my computer on my foot.
It mega-hurts.
So I was in the library when this cute girl came up and asked to borrow my external hard drive
It was at this point I realized she wanted the (D:)
Was going to change my password to MilkyTea but apparently that's too weak.
He couldn't get over his dead wife, so he got a new computer
Now he can processor.
What do Russians call a bad WiFi connection?
Inter-NIET
I know when I store files, my computer gets hungry. It starts telling me about the bytes I use and how many are remaining for him to fill up completely.
Did you hear about the keyboard that lost it's Period Key?
He was missing the point.
Did you hear about the new Wifi connected chef's knife?
It's cutting-edge technology.
'what's the Wifi password?'
'Its for security'
'Haha, yes, I know that. But what's the password?'.
'No, it's 'forsecurity'. All one word, lower case.'.
"Dad, my computer can't find the Wifi printer anymore... I renamed it to Bob Marley, same password."
"Why Bob Marley?" - he asked.
"Because its always jammin"
How do lumberjacks shut down their computers?.
They log off.
What made the computer so smart?
Because he listened to his motherboard!
What do you get when you cross a computer with an elephant? Lots of memory!
Why can't an IT guy keep a girlfriend?
He turns them all off and on again.
What's one of the worst things you could come across while surfing the web?
Your keyboard.
I just lost a key on my keyboard
Now its all out of control.
Why did the computer squeak? Because someone stepped on its mouse!
I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
Interesting that illegally copying on computers is known as piracy.
I suppose you CTRL C
Why did the computer crash?
It had a bad driver!
What is the favorite snack of a programmer, it's undoubtedly Cadbury bytes.
My doctor must think I have a bad hard drive
He said he needed to C:
Which keyboard shortcut doesn't work if you're incontinent?
Ctrl-P
I used to store motivational quotes that I found online, onto the cloud, for whenever I needed some inspiration.
Unfortunately I forgot the password for my Google account.
I have no Drive.
My keyboard fell apart today.
I feel like I'm losing Ctrl of everything.
Did you hear about the guy who got fired from the Keyboard Factory?
He didn't put enough shifts in.
Apparently Dracula sets up a password for every website so he can click on Your Account.
I visited a coffee shop where the Wifi password was wedonthavewifi.
It was a very frustrating conversation with the cashier.
I've got no home, I haven't got control, and I can't see any escape.
I should get a new keyboard.
I now pronounce you husband and wifi
You may kiss the bride goodbye.