If Russia wants to be the first country to produce a vaccine ...
... Then Soviet.
I have faith in Pfizer and its Covid vaccine, because they also make Viagra.
If Pfizer can raise the dead, it can save the living.
Don’t expect to hear yourself urinate after taking the Pfizer vaccine.
I had a doctor tell me the P was silent.
Serotonin and Dopamine: Technically, the only things you enjoy.
What did the femur say to the patella? I kneed you.
What did the Italian marine Biologist say when asked to identify an eel?
That's a moray!
I can't imagine the stress put on the workers in trying to figure out the newest flu vaccine...
It probably puts a strain on the staff.
Biology - It grows on you.
I created a vaccine for apathy, but unfortunately no one seems interested.
Heard Russia has the vaccine to Coronavirus. I'm probably not Putin that into my body.
I don't think I need a spine.
It's holding me back.
If this new covid vaccine works...
...It'll be a real shot in the arm for 2021.
I hear there's a new COVID-19 vaccine delivered via an audio interface as music.
It is hoped that this will lead to heard immunity.
My vaccine dad joke failed.
But it was worth a shot.
Where do hippos go to university? Hippocampus.
How do you know your dehydrated? You can hear your red blood cells crenating.
What did Russian do after they made the vaccine ?
They Put-in.
What type of flowers does everybody have? two-lips.
How did the herpetologist know he would be married soon? He caught the garter snake.
Using vaccines is...
Antibody-building.
Do you find bone puns humerus?
Did you guys hear about that 14-year old virgin girl who got pregnant after receiving the flu vaccine?
Sounds like an inoculate conception.
You know what it's called when you hurry to develop a vaccine?
... Russian.
Whats The Most tiniest Virus Ever? "smallpox".
Two red blood cells met and fell in love, but alas, it was all in vein.
Organ donors really put their heart into it.
My wife asked, “If someone’s body just isn’t fighting the virus, would getting the vaccine help?”
I told her I think it’s worth a shot.
Bacteria is the only culture some people have.
What is blood's message to the world? B POSITIVE.
How do you identify a bald eagle? All his feathers are combed over to one side.
What did the Endoplasmic Reticulum say to the Golgi. I like your body, and the Golgi said it's complex.
With all the talk of the pandemic and vaccines recently, I decided to consult a micro-biologist.
I thought they'd be smaller.
I was going to become a biologist. But all the endless coursework on hearts and lungs and kidneys and so on just made it seem like one long organ recital.
Why did the Russian vaccine cross the road?
To get to the other side effects.
How did the English major define microtome on his biology exam? An itsy bitsy book.
Did you hear about the famous microbiologist who traveled in thirty different countries and learned to speak six languages? He was a man of many cultures.
What was the biologist wearing on his first date with a hot chick? Designer jeans.
I heard Frozen University is banning anyone who got the COVID vaccine from returning for the spring quarter
I guess if you get vaccinated you won’t be headed to the ICU.
How is a dog and a marine biologist alike? One wags a tail and the other tags a whale.
What do you call the leader of a biology gang?
The Nucleboss.
How does Juliet maintain a constant body temperature? Romeostasis.
What do you call doctors who make vaccines for the flu?
Flu-Fighters.
What does a biologist wear when they're going out?
Designer genes.
How do you tell the difference between boys and girls?
Take their genes down.
What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexics Association.
Why was the scuba diver failing Biology? Because he was below "C" level.
What did the male stamen say to the female pistil? "I like your style."
Dolly Parton partially funded Moderna's COVID Vaccine.
It comes in two very large dosey-doses.
The Covid-19 vaccine should be tested on politicians first...
If they survive, the vaccine is safe.
If they don't, the country is safe.
Hey kids! I went back in time and formed a British 80s pop group called The Vaccine!
And now The Cure is no longer necessary!