How do you identify a bald eagle? All his feathers are combed over to one side.
What did the male stamen say to the female pistil? "I like your style."
What did the Italian marine Biologist say when asked to identify an eel?
That's a moray!
What did one brain say to another?
I lobe you.
Working on lab science animals is a real rat race.
Biology - It grows on you.
What do you call doctors who make vaccines for the flu?
Flu-Fighters.
Hey kids! I went back in time and formed a British 80s pop group called The Vaccine!
And now The Cure is no longer necessary!
Do you find bone puns humerus?
If Russia wants to be the first country to produce a vaccine ...
... Then Soviet.
Why do anti vaxxers hate vaccine jokes?
They never get them.
I heard Frozen University is banning anyone who got the COVID vaccine from returning for the spring quarter
I guess if you get vaccinated you won’t be headed to the ICU.
I can't imagine the stress put on the workers in trying to figure out the newest flu vaccine...
It probably puts a strain on the staff.
You know what it's called when you hurry to develop a vaccine?
... Russian.
I was going to become a biologist. But all the endless coursework on hearts and lungs and kidneys and so on just made it seem like one long organ recital.
If this new covid vaccine works...
...It'll be a real shot in the arm for 2021.
I created a vaccine for apathy, but unfortunately no one seems interested.
How did the herpetologist know he would be married soon? He caught the garter snake.
Serotonin and Dopamine: Technically, the only things you enjoy.
I hear there's a new COVID-19 vaccine delivered via an audio interface as music.
It is hoped that this will lead to heard immunity.
What did Russian do after they made the vaccine ?
They Put-in.
How do you know your dehydrated? You can hear your red blood cells crenating.
What type of flowers does everybody have? two-lips.
Two red blood cells met and fell in love, but alas, it was all in vein.
Organ donors really put their heart into it.
How is a dog and a marine biologist alike? One wags a tail and the other tags a whale.
What is the reproductive area in South America? Spermatagonia.
The Covid-19 vaccine should be tested on politicians first...
If they survive, the vaccine is safe.
If they don't, the country is safe.
Why did the Russian vaccine cross the road?
To get to the other side effects.
How do you tell the difference between boys and girls?
Take their genes down.
With all the talk of the pandemic and vaccines recently, I decided to consult a micro-biologist.
I thought they'd be smaller.
There's now a vaccine to make you better at geometry.
It's called Pythagorean Serum.
My wife asked, “If someone’s body just isn’t fighting the virus, would getting the vaccine help?”
I told her I think it’s worth a shot.
Using vaccines is...
Antibody-building.
What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexics Association.
Why was the scuba diver failing Biology? Because he was below "C" level.
Heard Russia has the vaccine to Coronavirus. I'm probably not Putin that into my body.
I heard the government is going to put chips inside people with Covid vaccines...
I hope I get Doritos.
Did you hear about the famous microbiologist who traveled in thirty different countries and learned to speak six languages? He was a man of many cultures.
How does Juliet maintain a constant body temperature? Romeostasis.
What do you call the leader of a biology gang?
The Nucleboss.
My vaccine dad joke failed.
But it was worth a shot.
Whats The Most tiniest Virus Ever? "smallpox".
Don’t expect to hear yourself urinate after taking the Pfizer vaccine.
I had a doctor tell me the P was silent.
How did the English major define microtome on his biology exam? An itsy bitsy book.
What was the biologist wearing on his first date with a hot chick? Designer jeans.
What is blood's message to the world? B POSITIVE.
What did the femur say to the patella? I kneed you.
Where do hippos go to university? Hippocampus.
I have faith in Pfizer and its Covid vaccine, because they also make Viagra.
If Pfizer can raise the dead, it can save the living.