I went to a theater performance done on a bunch of dictionaries the other day...
It was a play on words.
I just got fired from my theatre job. I guess I should've made a bigger scene about it.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I ain't no poet, but neither are you.
Why do poltergeists love haunting old theaters?
Because they can't wait to boo the performers.
What's the difference between a colorful women's garment and a famous live music venue?
One's a house of blues, the other's a blouse of hues.
Q: Why did the purple family have to move out?
A: They were plum too loud, excessively violet with one another, and were fuschiatives of the law.
When the theatre owner dies, his visitation hours are as follows: 1pm, 3pm, 6:30 pm, 9pm, and midnight.
Why did you fall in love with the Paris art museum? It was just Louvre at first site.
What did the painter say to the wall? Another crack like that and I'll have to plaster you!
Did you hear about the painter who works in jail? They say he had a brush with the law.
What painting is terrible at ever being happy? The Moaning Lisa.
After bidding farewell to my neurosurgeon friend, we promised that we would grey in touch!
My friend told me he had to leave the play after Act l. Knowing he'd waited forever to see it, I asked him why. He said the program stated that Act ll was two years later, and he refused to wait that long.
The fact that we were asked to leave our beautiful purple color house by the owner is still purplexing for me.
I tried to come up with a funny theatre joke, but it was all just an act.
I told the artist that his painting was terrible. I think he got the picture.
Q: How does an artist fill in a CV?
A: He draws on experience.
They say that the cardio system is the work of artery, but it is really just vein.
Great news! I'm a movie director now! I gave stellar directions to a very lovely family on their way to the theatre.
Why did the artist go to the lounge? Because it was her comfort tone.
Why do thespians have great hair? They want the perfect part.
Thankfully, not too many thieves are interested in acting on stage. They'd surely steal the show.
I was really surprised when I learned that singer Pink's favorite color was actually green. No one could have i-magenta-it.
What was the artist's favorite swimming stroke? The brushstroke.
The skeleton would love to see the latest horror flick, but he just doesn't have the guts for it.
Couple of friends have decided to put theatre style seats in their house. It will end in tiers.
Who else is a famous barnyard painter?
Pablo PIGcaso
Blue and green stopped fighting because they had agreed on peace teal.
Everyone was spot on, you really did make a great theatre lighting tech.
I seem to find a way of sneaking chocolate into movie theaters..
.. I always have a few twix up my sleeve.
10 saxophone players blew up a theatre...
authorities are on the lookout for the tenorists.
I just beat my friend in a Wild West themed art race!
I was quicker to the draw.
My buddy was cast in Snow White and The Seven Dwarfs, but he was still angry because he wasn't Happy.
Why are artists so temperamental? They have to get into the right frame of mind.
Did you hear about the color bomb?
Yeah it blue up.
Who do you call a pig who can paint like a great artist? Pablo PIGcaso.
The artist shouldn't have taken that sculpture for granite, now it's stone-cold.
All theatres love to see scarecrows out in the audience as reviewers! They're simply outstanding in their field.
Q. Why are orange jokes so dumb?
A. Because oranges are afraid to concentrate.
After completing the deadline just in the nick of time, the artist breathed a cyan of relief.
Q. What do you get when you combine Blue Agave and literature?
A. Tequila Mockingbird
Q. What is a mime's favorite time of the day?
A. Dusk, because all the colors are muted.
Theatre costumes must be handled with care since they're often laced with something.
Can anyone advise me what color my hair is?
I find it's a bit of a grey area.
Aliens hate playing golf in space as there are too many black holes!
A ship load of red paint crashed into a ship load of blue paint. The crews were marooned.
Why did the bald man decide to paint a bunch of rabbits on his head? He thought that they could look like hares from a distance.
The pirate steals arrrrt when he has the chance.
Jack is a lovable man with a colorful personality. He is a great hue-man.
Car Salesman: And if you don't like this color, we have another one in "Boulder Gray"
Me: Gray isn't very bold to begin with, how did you make it bolder?