Miracle Jokes

What are the 3 rules of Golf? If the ball goes right it's a slice, if the ball goes left it's a hook, and it the ball goes straight it's a miracle.
Girl, you and me are like loaves and fishes. Together we might be a miracle.
The Miracle Child A woman starts dating a doctor. Before too long, she becomes pregnant and they donโ€™t know what to do. Long About nine months later, just about the time she is going to give birth, a priest goes into the hospital for a prostate gland infection. The doctor says to the woman, โ€œI know what weโ€™ll do. After Iโ€™ve operated on the priest, Iโ€™ll give the baby to him and tell him it was a miracle.โ€ โ€œDo you think it will work?โ€ she asks the doctor. โ€œItโ€™s worth a try.โ€ he says. So the doctor delivers the baby and then operates on the priest. After the operation he goes in to the priest and says, โ€œFather, youโ€™re not going to believe this.โ€ โ€œWhat?โ€ says the priest. โ€œWhat happened?โ€ โ€œYou gave birth to a child.โ€ โ€œBut thatโ€™s impossible!โ€ โ€œI just did the operation,โ€ insists the doctor. โ€œItโ€™s a miracle! Hereโ€™s your baby.โ€ About fifteen years go by, and the priest realizes that he must tell his son the truth. One day he sits the boy down and says, โ€œSon, I have something to tell you. Iโ€™m not your father.โ€ The son says, โ€œWhat do you mean, youโ€™re not my father?โ€ The priest replies, โ€œIโ€™m your mother. The archbishop is your father.โ€
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