Does Jokes

"I want to do with you what spring does with the cherry trees."
― Pablo Neruda, Twenty Love Poems and A Song of Despair
How does it feel to be the only star in the sky?
"Your first job is to prepare the soil. The best tool for this is your neighbor's motorized garden tiller. If your neighbor does not own a garden tiller, suggest that he buy one."
- Dave Barry
"Crabgrass can grow on bowling balls in airless rooms, and there is no known way to kill it that does not involve nuclear weapons."
- Dave Barry
"Well, Art is Art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water. And east is east and west is west and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does. Now you tell me what you know."
"Man does not control his own fate. The women in his life do that for him."
"Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does."
"Practically everybody in New York has half a mind to write a book, and does."
I heard milk does the body good, but man, how much have you been drinking?
Does your Dad own Snapple, because you're made of the best stuff on earth?
Milk does the body good, but damn how much did you drink?
What does it feel like to be the most gorgeous girl in the room?
What type of underwear does a yard wear?
Lawngerie.
Is that a bat in your pocket, or does my costume excite you?
Baby, the Millennium Falcon isn't the only thing that does it in less than 12 parsecs.
Want to start your day laughing? Register to our Daily Joke!
Did you mean:
Continue With: Facebook Google
By continuing, you agree to our T&C and Privacy Policy