Police label anyone attacking Chuck Norris as a Code 45-11.... a suicide.
Ghosts are actually caused by Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them.
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.
Chuck Norris can beat his reflection at rock paper scissors.
Chuck Norris can ski up a mountain.
Chuck Norris is the only person on the planet that can kick you in the back of the face.
The saddest moment for a child is not when he learns Santa Claus isn't real, it's when he learns Chuck Norris is.
Chuck Norris can hit you so hard your blood will bleed.
Chuck Norris once round-house kicked a salesman. Over the phone.
Chuck Norris once climbed Mt. Everest in 15 minutes, 14 of which he was building a snowman at the bottom.
Chuck refers to himself in the fourth person.
Big foot claims he saw Chuck Norris.