Around Jokes

Which lawn decorations move around from yard to yard?
Gnomads.
I’m saving money for bushes to plant around the yard when my career is over...
It’s my retirement hedge fund.
Hey baby, let me take you on a trip around the world.
Girl, you must be blue because you’re the hottest star around right now.
You must be the North Star because the light around you guided me here.
I think you might be a star, because I can't stop orbiting around you.
Hey girl! Let me orbit around you.
Girl, I'm jealous of your shirt.
Because it's wrapped around you and I'm not.
Won't you wear my ring up around your neck
To tell the world I'm yours by heck!
Have you seen any linking verbs around here? Because you are my complement and I want to connect.
Tiger vs. Dog A wealthy man decided to go on a safari in Africa. He took his faithful pet dog along for company. One day the dog starts chasing butterflies and before long discovers that he is lost. Wandering about he notices a tiger heading rapidly in his direction with the obvious intention of having him for lunch. The dog thinks, "Boy, I'm in deep trouble now!" Then he notices some bones on the ground close by and immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching tiger. Just as the tiger is about to leap, the dog exclaims loudly, "Man! That was one delicious tiger. I wonder if there are any more around here." Hearing this, the tiger halts his attack in mid-stride as a look of terror overcomes him and slinks away into the trees. "Whew!" says the tiger. "That was close. That dog nearly had me." Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put his knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the tiger. So, off he goes. But the dog sees him heading after the tiger with great speed, and figures that something must be up. The monkey soon catches up with the tiger, spills the beans, and strikes a deal for himself with the tiger. The tiger is furious at being made a fool of and says, "Here monkey, hop on my back and see what's going to happen to that conniving dog." Now the dog sees the tiger coming with the monkey on his back, and thinks, "What am I going to do now?" Instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers pretending he hasn't seen them yet. And just when they get close enough to hear, the dog says, "Where's that monkey? I just can never trust him. I sent him off half an hour ago to bring me another tiger, and he's still not back!" The tiger ran away.
I'm a gardener and I'm OK
I sleep all night and I plant all day!
I dress in grubby clothing and hang around with slugs.
Oh I'm happy in the garden
With dirt and plants and bugs.
Do you have the thyme? I need to get somewhere around tree o’clock.
Are you teh Easter Bunny? Because you’ve spent the entire day hopping around in my head.
When you're around, every mall is a sky mall.
Is there a fireman around? Because you are smoking hot.
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