Steve from Texas is waiting for his big surgery, when his anesthesiologist walks into the room with his equipment.
Steve swallows nervously and asks: "Excuse me, would you mind explaining to me how you'll put me under? This is my first time."
"Oh sure," said the anesthesiologist kindly, "Don't worry, I only use the best drugs and I have lots of experience measuring just the right amount. You won't feel a thing and will wake up with no side effects at all."
"Oh," breathed Steve, "that's awesome, thanks Doc!"
"Sure," said the doctor, "by the way, are you insured with any of our..."
"Ah, no." Said Steve, "I don't have insurance."
"Ah, I see." says the anesthesiologist and begins to sing: "Twinkle twinkle little star..."
God was giving out traits to Adam and Eve. He had two left and decided to ask their preference.
He said, “So I have two things left for you both. The first is peeing while standing up…”
Adam jumped up and said, “Me! Me! I want to pee standing up! Then I can just pee wherever I am standing. Oh, and I can write my name in the snow!”
God said, “Are you sure you want it? I haven’t even said what the other trait is?”
Adam said, “I don’t care. Peeing standing up is so cool, nothing can beat that!”
God shrugged and asked, “Eve, are you ok with this?”
Eve looked at how happy Adam was and shrugged herself. “It’s ok, I’m sure I’ll also be happy with whatever I get.”
God nodded, “Yes. For you Eve, the last trait, then - Multiple orgasms.”
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