If Russia wants to be the first country to produce a vaccine ...
... Then Soviet.
With all the talk of the pandemic and vaccines recently, I decided to consult a micro-biologist.
I thought they'd be smaller.
The Covid-19 vaccine should be tested on politicians first...
If they survive, the vaccine is safe.
If they don't, the country is safe.
My vaccine dad joke failed.
But it was worth a shot.
I can't imagine the stress put on the workers in trying to figure out the newest flu vaccine...
It probably puts a strain on the staff.
Why did the Russian vaccine cross the road?
To get to the other side effects.
Dolly Parton partially funded Moderna's COVID Vaccine.
It comes in two very large dosey-doses.
I created a vaccine for apathy, but unfortunately no one seems interested.
Don’t expect to hear yourself urinate after taking the Pfizer vaccine.
I had a doctor tell me the P was silent.
What do you call doctors who make vaccines for the flu?
Flu-Fighters.
Did you guys hear about that 14-year old virgin girl who got pregnant after receiving the flu vaccine?
Sounds like an inoculate conception.
I hear there's a new COVID-19 vaccine delivered via an audio interface as music.
It is hoped that this will lead to heard immunity.
Using vaccines is...
Antibody-building.
I heard Frozen University is banning anyone who got the COVID vaccine from returning for the spring quarter
I guess if you get vaccinated you won’t be headed to the ICU.
Hey kids! I went back in time and formed a British 80s pop group called The Vaccine!
And now The Cure is no longer necessary!
What did Russian do after they made the vaccine ?
They Put-in.
You know what it's called when you hurry to develop a vaccine?
... Russian.
I heard the government is going to put chips inside people with Covid vaccines...
I hope I get Doritos.
If this new covid vaccine works...
...It'll be a real shot in the arm for 2021.
Why do anti vaxxers hate vaccine jokes?
They never get them.
Heard Russia has the vaccine to Coronavirus. I'm probably not Putin that into my body.
My wife asked, “If someone’s body just isn’t fighting the virus, would getting the vaccine help?”
I told her I think it’s worth a shot.
I have faith in Pfizer and its Covid vaccine, because they also make Viagra.
If Pfizer can raise the dead, it can save the living.
There's now a vaccine to make you better at geometry.
It's called Pythagorean Serum.