Whole Jokes

“Nutrition labels should include a “What if I ate the whole thing” section.”
― Unknown
“The key to my heart looks a whole lot like a plate of pasta.”
― Unknown
I need three things: The sun for the day, The moon for the night, and you for the whole life.
What do you find when you swallow peas whole?
Inner peas
Do you celebrate Boxing Day? Because you're the whole package.
"Hey baby, you look so good, I wish I could plant you and grow a whole field of y'all!"
- Fresh Prince of Bel-Air
"You could be drinking whole [milk] if you wanted to."
- Napoleon Dynamite (2004)
You might not be America, but I found a whole new world with you.
What can a whole orange do that half an orange can never do?
“Look round!”
"The holy passion of friendship is so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime if not asked to lend money."
— Mark Twain
I was watching a new cooking show where you only get to pick one pan to use the whole time…
It's called, "Do You Have The Skillet Takes?!"
If I had a nickel for every COVID-19 joke I know, I could buy a whole lot of toilet paper.
My son told me he can drink a whole glass a whiskey straight.
Personally, I think it's neat.
I said to her, are going to eat that whole plate of spaghetti??
She said: no, it's in pasta bowl
Why would a judge make a good tooth fairy?
Because they want the tooth, the whole tooth, and nothing but the tooth.