Held Jokes

why are the discarded papers that once held the halloween candy just like vocalists who have lost their rhythm, art, and poetry?
they are both empty rappers
Chuck Norris changed a lightbulb...
With one hand he held the bulb, with the other he turned the house.
Arson Suspect is Held in Massachusetts Fire
I work at an Ink company in Spain. Yesterday I held a Competition about our company’s history. But looks like no one wanted to be a part of the
Spanish Ink Quiz Session.
There was an Old Man at a casement,
Who held up his hands in amazement;
When they said, 'Sir, you'll fall!'
He replied, 'Not at all!'
That incipient Old Man at a casement.
There was an Old Man of Kamschatka,
Who possessed a remarkable fat cur;
His gait and his waddle
Were held as a model
To all the fat dogs in Kamschatka.
Why did the belt get arrested? Because he held up a pair of pants. What do prisoners use to call each other? Cell phones.
I just held a huge Thor party for my son's 5th birthday.
He got overwhelmed because I guess he wanted something a little more Loki.
What kind of party is held in a cornfield?
A cornball!
"If I held you any closer I would be on the other side of you."
Why did the belt go to jail? Because it held up a pair of pants!
Why did the belt get arrested? He held up a pair of pants.
If you’re doing dangerous work on a platform that’s held together by screwed in bolts, then your life is hanging by a thread.
In ancient Egypt if you held a stinging insect you were thought to be very attractive
Because beauty is in the eye of the beeholder