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Abraham Jokes

Italy Puns
What speech did Abraham Lincoln give when he went to Italy?
The Spaghetties-burg Address.
Knife Puns
The knife that Abraham used to kill Isaac has been found in Britain.
Apparently, it was a Dyson.
Food Quotes
"If this is coffee, please bring me some tea; but if this is tea, please bring me some coffee."
– Abraham Lincoln
Funny Animal Quotes
“No matter how much cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens." - Abraham Lincoln
One Liners and Short Jokes
What do George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, and Christopher Columbus all have in common?
They seem to all been born on holidays.