Poop Puns

With these sh**ty puns, you won't be able to hold it in for much longer!

Poop Puns

All farts...are laughing gas.
My wife is mad at me because I took a dump on the roof...
How can I wipe the slate clean?
I was walking down the road and slipped on some dog poo. Someone came up behind me and slipped as well. Trying to sympathize, I said "I just did that!"
They slapped me and said "use the toilet next time"
How would you call a tutle's poo?
Turdle.
If you take a dump on a stump...
Does that make it a toilet tree?
Turns out our washing machine DOES have a “baby poop” setting.
It’s called “Heavy Doody”
Where do cow farts come from?
The dairy air.
What did the poop shoveler say when he quit his job?
"I'm dung with this sh*t!"
My friend explained how powerful (yet invisible) farts work via demonstration.
I was blown away by his transparency.
In a recent study, NASA scientists confirmed that Uranus smells like farts.
People who pretends to never go taking a dump are full of sh**.
A man walks into a zoo, there was only one animal in the zoo.
It was a Shitzu.
What kind of doctor checks ghost poo?
A ghost-roenterologist.
How do people take a dump when, well, nobody gives a s**t?
I always take a dump at 11:59 PM. That way, when the clock strikes midnight it’s the same sh**, different day.
A dung beetle spent an entire day rolling a ball of dung up a hill, only to have it fall down to the other side...
Needless to say, he lost his sh*t.
Scientists have just discovered a fossilized Dinosaur fart...
They say it’s a blast from the past!
Poo jokes...
Are funny sh**.
Why did the painter take a dump on the floor?
It was the work of fart.
What do you call coffee made from poo?
Crappuccino.
The scariest day of my life was when we ran into a bear taking a dump inside our campsite.
That sh** was in
Why shouldn’t you fart on elevators?
It’s wrong on so many levels.
After letting elephant dung dry in the sun, it's nearly indestructible.
In fact, I'd say it's pretty heavy doody.
I found a side job collecting dog poo from people's yards.
It's not much, but business is picking up.
I tried to make a poo but could only squeeze out a p**.
I must be missing some bowels.
I’ve been going through a lot of sh** lately
I hate my job as a plumber.
When your poo goes into the sewers, it's not yours anymore.
It becomes pooblic domain.
I was walking along when I saw a pile of dog sh** on the side of the street, a little further on I saw an identical one.
That was a crazy deja poo.
What do you call a cop standing on dog poo?
Officer on doody!
My farts don’t smell, they don’t have noses.
Why did the baker go to the toilet?
Because he kneaded a poo.