"Low self-esteem is like driving through life with your hand-brake on."
- Maxwell Maltz
“Americans will put up with anything provided it doesn’t block traffic.”
– Dan Rather
"People that insist upon drinking and driving, are putting the quart before the hearse."
– Gilbert K. Chesterton
"I don't run a car, have never run a car. I could say that this is because I have this extremely tender environmentalist conscience, but the fact is I hate driving."
- David Attenborough
"You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive."
“The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status, or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we all believe that we are above-average drivers.”
– Dave Barry
“Never underestimate the therapeutic power of driving and listening to very loud music.”
"Like all bad drivers, he thought he was the best driver in the world."
- Rebecca West
“You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine'.”
― Tommy Cooper
“I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.”
– Steven Wright
“A car’s weakest part is the nut holding the steering wheel.”
“When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife.”
– Prince Philip
"Driving is a spectacular form of amnesia. Everything is to be discovered, everything to be obliterated."
– Jean Baudrillard
“Money may not buy happiness, but I’d rather cry in a Jaguar than on a bus.”
– Francoise Sagan
“Road trips required a couple of things: a well-balanced diet of caffeine, salt, and sugar and an excellent selection of tunes—oh, and directions.”
– Jenn McKinlay
“Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?”
– Robin Williams
“Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?”
– George Carlin