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Velocity Jokes

Physics Puns
Speed and Velocity are brothers.
Velocity has a family, is rich and teaches classes around the world.
Speed dropped out and still lives with his parents.
They think Speed lacks Direction.
Space Pick Up Lines
My pants are approaching escape velocity.
Heart Puns
When my girlfriend told me she needed time and distance, my heart almost stopped,
Fortunately, she was just calculating velocity.
Jogging Pick Up Lines
Distance equals velocity times time, or we could just simply race to the finish line.
Planet Puns
How did the space criminal escape from the prison planet?
He achieved escape velocity.
Roses are Red Violets are Blue Jokes
Roses are red, Roses are blue
Depending on their velocity relative to you