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Stretch Jokes

Lightning Puns
My wife said the stretch marks on her legs looked like lightning bolts...
So I said, that's because you have thunder thighs.
Quotes
“From the ages of eight to 18, me and my family moved around a lot. Mostly we would just stretch, but occasionally one of us would actually get up to go to the fridge.”
Jarod Kintz
Yoga Pick Up Lines
I want to stretch with you.
Puns
My girlfriend wants to open a yoga studio, even though she currently cannot afford it.
I told her it's a bit of a stretch.
Funny Parenting Quotes
“Think of stretch marks as pregnancy service stripes.”

– Joyce Armor.
One Liners for Kids
Why did the God of Thunder need to stretch his muscles so much when he was a kid?
He was a little Thor.
Utensils Puns
If you try to stretch a fork to see if it breaks...
Are you testing its utensil strength?