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Polish is As Polish Does! - Laugh Out Loud!

When we say Polish, we don't mean people from Poland!  We all know these 'Polish' people, who always complain but never do anything about it, who always nag and never seem to be happy. Enjoy this collection of hilarious 'Polish' jokes! 

 

 

A Polish woman wakes up her husband in the middle of the night. 
 
"What happened?" The husband asks worriedly.
 
"Nothing..." said his wife, "I just don't understand how you can sleep with  such a small salary."
 
* * * Polish is As Polish Does!
 
A Polish father tell his daughter: "My darling, don't merry this man. He's crippled, ugly and an orphan."
 
The daughter, surprised and angry, tells him: "I only care about love, daddy, I don't care about his looks or his background."
 
Her father says to her: "I'm not talking about that. Don't you think he's suffered enough?"
 
* * * 
 
A polish man goes to the doctor and complains: "Doc I have a problem, my wife is cheating on me, but I'm not growing any horns!"
 
The doctor, amused, explains to him that the whole cheating and horns thing is only a metaphor. 
 
The man breaths in relief. "Thank god! I thought I was low on Calcium!"
 
* * * 
 
Two Polish husbands are talking. 
 
One says: "My best friend, Jimmy, ran away with my wife."
The second asks: "Is he still your best friend?"
 
"Not since he brought her back."
 
 
* * * 
 
 
A Polish husband says to his friend: "Don't ask, my parrot died."
The friend: "Of old age?"
"No, of frustration. Since I got married he hasn't been able to get a word in edgewise.
 
* * * 
 
 
A Polish mother asks her daughter: "I understand you've been having some disagreements with your fiance' about the wedding?"
The daughter: "Just small things, like I want a white dress and he doesn't want to get married."
 
 
* * * 
 
 
"Will you cry at my funeral?" Asks a Polish husband his wife.
 
"Sure," answers the wife, "you know I cry over the silliest things."
 
 
 
 
 
Scroll below for more funny jokes!
 
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Related Topics: funny, hilarious, wife, husband, jokes, polish
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