My wife was standing in the kitchen, preparing our usual Soft-boiled eggs and toast for breakfast, wearing only The t-shirt that she normally slept in.
As I walked in, almost awake, she turned to me and said aggressively, “You’ve got to make love to me this very moment!”
My eyes lit up and I thought, “I am either still dreaming or this is going to be my lucky day!”
Not wanting to lose the moment, I embraced her and then gave it my all; right there on the kitchen table.
Afterwards she said, “Thanks,” and returned to the stove, her T-shirt still around her neck.
Happy, but a little puzzled, I asked, “What was that all about?”
“The egg timer’s broken."
Joke: Mom and Dad's New Wife
When a husband's young new bride and his ex-wife are planning to wear the same dress on their wedding day, you know it's a recipe for disaster...
Joke: Putting Your Private Part Right Is Gonna Cost
When a doctor is tasked with fixing a rabbi's mangled manhood, he explains that there's a variation in price depending on the size...
Joke: These Newlyweds Can't Get Enough
Homer and Darlene are countryside newlyweds. They can't get enough of each other, but their nooner is taking too long. The town doctor proposes a useful solution...
Joke: The Panty Rule
A newlywed couple are about to consummate their wedding night when the husband decides to lay down the law. He couldn't predict what would happen next...
Joke: Two Women Hit It Off In Arizona
A wise woman gets a lift from a younger woman while walking out in the Arizona desert. It isn't long before they get talking...
When Funny Signs Meet Epic Fails, Hilarity Ensues...
These funny signs, tags, and maps show just how much the people responsible for creating them had failed, and it's absolutely hilarious!
18 Funny Cartoons That Nail the Perfect Punchline
Enjoy this hilarious collection of one-panel comics by New Yorker cartoonist Tommy Siegel
Hilarious: 16 Times People Didn't Pay Attention...
If you ever doubted the fact that knowing English is important, these hilarious mistakes made on public signs will definitely change your mind once and for all!
When it Comes to Comedy, Twins Have an Unfair Advantage...
Just for Laughs is at it again, this time with the best twin pranks around.
18 Terrible Sign Designs That Will Have You Bust a Gut
Feeling down? Well, after reading these 18 side-splitting signs, you will no longer have that problem on your hands...
Hilarious Tweets: Some of the Funniest Tweets of the Decade!
Twitter can truly hilarious to use thanks to the contribution of some of its more prominent users. Here are 18 hilarious Tweets with unexpected ends.
Hilarious: Grammar is a Funny Subject!
These grammar jokes will have you on the floor they are so ridiculous!
Hilarious: The Wackiest Car Designs I've Ever Seen...
These car owners sure know how to make their vehicles stand out on the streets.
Should We Really “Beware” These Cute Doggies?
These signs ask us to “beware” of these dogs. But we think you will end up laughing at them.
Nothing Captures Life's Absurdities Better Than a Cartoon..
Life is a bit of a puzzle these days, yet these hilarious comics seem to put the pieces back together!
A Hilarious Tribute to Cats and Kittens!
This hilarious video involves a kitten being given some life advice by the household's older cat in what amounts to almost three minutes of laughter.
Get Ready to Laugh with these Witty Comics
Enjoy this hilarious collection of one-panel comics by cartoonist D.T. Walsh.
Hilarious Language Humor: 18 Funny Translation Fails
These translation fails are just ridiculously funny.
FUNNY: Grandparents Being Hilarious Without Even Trying
These priceless grandparent moments will make your day.
16 Parenthood Comics That’ll Make You Roll In the Aisles
These witty comics show the funny side of having a family and parenting
Hilarious: The Young vs. The Old on a Date!
Dating when you're 20 versus when you're middle-aged is similar, but also completely different...
Funny: The Best Food Pranks Compilation!
Everything food is up this week in this compilation of the best food pranks by Just For Laughs.
Hilarious: English is a Seriously ODD Language...
If you thought English is a clear-cut and tidy language, you better read this.
Hilarious: What Is the TRUE Meaning of Marriage?
This is why all young lovers look forward to marriage....
These Truths About Marriage are Bound Crack You Up!
These absolute truths about marriage will really crack you up!
These Hilarious Kids Were Left Unsupervised...
When toddlers or young children are left on their own, the likelihood is a disaster will ensue. Here are 20 timely reminders why they shouldn't be left alone!
Funny Stand Up: Can't Argue With Wife Post Surgery!
Jim Gaffigan in a funny stand up video about arguing with his wife after her brain surgery.
These Punny Illustrations Will Give You a Good Chuckle
Enjoy this collection of illustrated puns by artist Teo Zirinis.
Food and Humor Collide in These Cheeky Restaurants
These restaurants have a cheeky sense of humor!
Prepare to Giggle: 22 Hilarious Animal Comics!
Sit back and enjoy this amusing collection of animal comics by Jimmy Craig.
Hilarious: The Silliest Things in Life are FINALLY Explained
I have never seen more accurate and hilarious assessments of our daily lives, then these simple graphs.
Comedy Classics: Christmas Shopping With Mr. Bean
This Christmas, let’s go shopping with Mr. Bean.
Classic Comedy: About the Importance of Stuff
One of the funniest and smartest comedy routines in history!
This Hilarious Video Starts With an Elephant...
This is one of the most clever pranks I've ever seen
Laugh Out Loud at These 15 Epic Design Fails
When it comes to terrible ideas, the human race often ends up coming out on top as these photos prove!
The Art of Comedy: A Hilarious Abbott & Costello Routine
Enjoy this rare vintage skit of the masters of comedy, Abbott & Costello.
Classic Comedy: Getting Rid of Whom?? (Adult Humor)
I can't stop laughing at this hilarious scene...
The Most Hilarious Collection of Police Reports (16 Pics)
Sometimes the police reports are the best part of the paper!
Hilarious! Would You Like a Glass of Milk?
What happens to these unsuspecting victims when they are sold milk from a dog?
Winter Can Be CRAZY Sometimes - 16 Bizarre Pics
These chilly pictures show just how crazy and harsh winter can be.
15 Unbelievable Construction and Interior Design FAILS
You have to see these crazy design fails to believe that such monstrosities even exist!
Classic Laurel & Hardy: Dance Like No One's Watching!
Get ready to laugh with Laurel & Hardy’s dance moves.