A couple were golfing one day on a very exclusive golf course, lined with million-dollar houses. On the third tee the husband said "Honey, be very careful when you drive the ball. Don't knock out any windows. It'll cost us a fortune to fix!"
The wife teed up and shanked it right through the window of the biggest house on the course. The husband cringed and said "I told you to watch out for the houses! All right, let's go up there, apologise and see how much this is going to cost."
They walked up, knocked on the door and heard a voice say "Come on in." They opened the door and saw glass all over the floor and a broken bottle lying on its side in the foyer. A man on the couch said "Are you the people that broke my window?"
"Uh, yeah. Sorry about that." the husband replied.
"No, actually I want to thank you. I'm a genie that was trapped for a thousand years in that bottle. You've released me! I'm allowed to grant three wishes, and I'll give you each one wish and keep the last one for myself."
"Wow, great!" the husband said. "I want a million dollars a year
for the rest of my life!"
"No problem. It's the least I could do. And you, what do you want?" the genie said, looking at the wife. "I want a house in every country of the world!" she said.
"Consider it done!" the genie replied.
"And what's your wish genie, now that you're finally free?" asked the husband.
"Well, since I've been trapped in that bottle, I haven't had sex with a woman in a thousand years. My wish is to sleep with your wife."
The husband looked at the wife and said "Well, we did get a lot of money and all those houses honey. I guess I don't care." The genie took the wife upstairs and ravished her for two hours. Afterwards, the genie rolled over, looked at the wife, and said "How old is your husband anyway?"
"38." she replied.
"And he still believes in genies?? That's amazing..."
|
Hilarious: Are You Sure That's What You Really Want?
A man has a rather unusual request for a genie that he finds in a lamp on a Californian beach.
Tennis Comedy: These Interruptions Stole the Show!
These players thought they would only have to deal with their match, but the circumstances ended up getting real funny!
Great Joke: Three Dinosaurs and Their Three Wishes
This joke begins millions of years ago, as 3 dinosaurs find a magic lamp...
Joke: The Magic Scales
A woman goes over to a weight machine while waiting for a bus. To her amazement, the machine talks back to her and appears to be able to predict the future...
Joke: The Devil Has a Schedule to Keep...
This joke begins with a man reaching the gates of hell and meeting Satan.
21 One-Panel Comics That Are Short, Sweet, and Hilarious!
Get ready to giggle at the hilarious one-panel comics by Glenn McCoy.
15 Vintage Photos That Will Make You Laugh
These weird and funny vintage photos don't make any sense!
Beware! These Funny Comics May Cause Halloween Giggles
Enjoy these hilariously silly one-panel comics by Doug Hill to add some humor to your Halloween this year.
These Science Comics Will Make You Laugh Out Loud
Ed Himelblau is a biology professor who also makes some seriously funny comics.
Quirky Shop Signs That’ll Leave You Smiling
These shop signs prove that many shopkeepers still have a healthy sense of humor!
Classic Comedy: What's Your Name?
A classic skit from the ground-breaking British sketch show 'A Bit of Fry and Laurie', starring Stephen Fry and Hugh Laurie
Take a (Funny) Change of Perspective With These Comics
You look at something, only to soon realize that what you thought you saw was something else entirely. Now, add humor to that equation and you have the work of Shanghai Tango.
This is One of the Funniest Videos I've Ever Seen! (Cheeky)
This hilarious short video is just laugh out loud funny.
Hilarious: These Dogs Never Saw it Coming...
When these dogs get pranked, they can't believe it!
These Guys are Either Incredibly Brave or Remarkably Stupid!
These people seem least bothered by safety, but we are genuinely scared for them.
The Ridiculous Shenanigans of Laurel and Hardy
Laurel and Hardy never fail to make us laugh.
Cuteness Overload: Watch Babies Crack Up With Pets!
These hilarious baby and pet moments are too cute!
Hilarious! Buying a Bed Takes Some Thought...(RUDE)
When an attractive customer needs convincing about a certain bed, the salesman can't believe his luck!
15 Funny Pictures of Pets Engaged in Shenanigans
These hilarious entries from the Comedy Pet Photography Awards will have you rolling in laughter.
The Vengeful Car - Hilarious Prank!
A girl asks random men to help push her car, obviously they all jump at the occasion to look all manly and full of good intentions. Unfortunately, it turns out the woman's car can not only drive itself, but is hungry to get his revenge on his owner!
Mr. Bean Never Expected a Round of Golf Like That...
Mr Bean decides to treat himself to a round of crazy golf. He starts off with a fantastic hole in one, but things start to take a turn for the worse…
The Funny, Odd and Wacky Things Kids Say - 20 Quotes
Kids can say the funniest, oddest, or the most unintentionally profound things sometimes. Here are 20 hilarious and wholesome examples from real life.
In Pictures: Comedy Wildlife Photo Awards 2023!
Enjoy the hilarious winners of the Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards 2023!
These Dad Comics Will Make You Smile and Laugh
Let’s celebrate Father’s Day with these absolutely hilarious cartoons.
Hilarious: Are These Weirdest Signs Ever Made?
Enjoy this hilarious compilation of weird signs that will have you in stitches!
These 'Genius' Repairs Will Make You Laugh Out Loud!
These photos prove that being an amateur engineer for a day may not work out as well as you'd like!
Fun-Loving Grandparents: These Photos Will Make Your Day!
To help crush the negative stereotypes that sometimes surround the elderly, here are 20 fantastic photos of grandparents acting absolutely hilariously!
These Single-Frame Cartoons are Hilarious Fun
Laugh out loud with the hilarious one-frame comics of Mat Barton.
Irony Can Be Sweet, As Is Evidenced By These Pictures...
When you see something ironic, it'll often make you stop in your tracks and burst into a fit of laughter, as I'm sure these next 11 images will.
Brilliant! Now THAT'S What I Call Perfect Comic Timing!
Michael Davis's juggling is something out of the ordinary. Be warned, you may find this peformance ridiculously hilarious.
Funny Prank: A Sign It's Time For a Kiss!
Who knew, one only needs to be holding a "Kiss Me" sign to get all the girls and... others...
These Signboards Have the Worst Spelling Mistakes
These have to be some of the most unfortunate typos ever.
It’s Time for Your Weekly Dose of Hilarious Cartoons!
Enjoy this hilarious collection of minimalist one-panel comics by Jon Adams.
Nothing Captures Life's Absurdities Better Than a Cartoon..
Life is a bit of a puzzle these days, yet these hilarious comics seem to put the pieces back together!
Food and Humor Collide in These Cheeky Restaurants
These restaurants have a cheeky sense of humor!
Classic Comedy: How to Keep a Man Focused!
A hilarious skit showing the fastest way to re-capture a man's wandering attention...
You Won't Believe What This Little Old Lady Gets Up To...
This hilarious prank involves a sweet old lady pretending to deal drugs in large quantities in a public park...
These Doormats Are Just Hilarious (15 Pics)
Amuse your guests with these ridiculously creative door mats.