What's a Vikings favourite dance?
The Loki cokey.
Did you hear about the viking who hit his thumb with a hammer and bit his tongue?
It was Thor.
What do you call a Viking who is really good at basketball?
a Vallhalla Balla.
How does a Viking show the amount of raiding and pillaging that they do at the same time?
They use a Sven Diagram.
Did you hear about the Viking who was reincarnated?
He was Bjorn again.
Where do Vikings go when they get old?
The Norsing home.
Did the Vikings believe in reincarnation?
That's a re-Thorical question.
What does a Muslim Viking say at the movie theater?
Valhalla Snackbar!
Where do Viking warrior scrabble champions go when they die?
Vowel-halla
What kind of car does a viking drive?
A fjord
The Vikings had an initiative tradition where a child had to participate in a raid to become a full man.
As they say, it takes a pillage to raise a child.
A man goes into a Chinese restaurant and sees people dressed like vikings
"Excuse me, ladies and gentleman. I am a well traveled man and the atmosphere of my excursions must be perfect. I must kindly ask you to leave."
A big, muscular man dressed in Viking armor walked up to the man and said
"Norway"
What stories did Vikings tell their children?
Norsery Rhymes
My friends and I are starting a disco group.
We'll dress as a Viking, a Mongol, a Caribbean pirate, a Bedouin raider, and a Spanish conquistador.
We call ourselves: The Pillage People.
What do you call a group of penniless Viking grave diggers?
The poor norsemen of the necropolis.
Was Henry VI a ViKing?
My girlfriend said if I don't stop my obsession with Viking culture she'll fight me to the death.
"Jokes on you," I said. "If I die in battle, I'll go straight to Valhalla."
What do you call a viking who is attracted to both genders?
Biking
Where did the Viking buy his guitar?
Nordstrom's
What is a Vikings favourite letter?
Well obviously it's the C!
Why were the Vikings such good sailors?
You can lead a Norse to water but you can't make him sink.
What was the Vikings favorite song while invading England ?
Heathen flow by Pearl Jam
Why did the Vikings not have high doorknobs?
Because of Loki.
Why did the teacher use the evolution of Thor in viking mythology to teach both literature and Northern European history in her class?
She wanted to demonstrate using a Meta-Thor.
One night, a Viking called Rudolph the red was looking out of his window when he suddenly said, "It's going to rain."
His wife asked, "How do you know?"
"Because Rudolph the red knows rain, dear."
When the Vikings discovered America, what did they name it?
Norse America.
Vikings weren't exactly the best at drinking contests.
They were quite MEADiocre.
How did Vikings send secret messages?
Norse code
What is a Viking's favorite music?
Ragnarock.
The Vikings had an initiative tradition where a child had to participate in a raid to become a full man
... as they say, it takes a pillage to raise a child.
What is the most popular console with the vikings?
The axe-box
What does vikings call english villages?
Chopping centers.
What did a viking said to the other after a dad joke?
Aesir what you did there.
What do you call a vegetarian Viking?
Norvegan.
What do you tell the nobles of Scandinavia whenever you're leaving their house?
Viking.
Old Norse cuisine is simply not to my Viking.
How do Vikings get each other's attention?
They ValHolla!
What did the Viking chieftain say when asked about his motivation?
"I'm in it for the longhall."
What do you call a Swedish cycling group?
Viking Biking
A viking adds symbols to an axe he has just made ...
" Oh no iv runed it"
How can you tell if you're at a classy Viking restaurant?
They have Valhallet parking
Why are Scandinavian women so hot?
The Vikings didn't bring back the ugly ones.
Did you hear about the viking cannibal?
He had a Swede-tooth.
What are the Vikings favorite drink?
Mini Sodas
Why do vikings have barcodes on their ships?
Its so they can scan-de-navien
What do Vikings call the people that cut their hair?
Barberians.
Don't send our invitations to a viking themed wedding until the date is set in stone
Or they'll be runed
What do you call a weary Viking conqueror?
Bluetooth low energy
What did one Viking war paint say to the other?
Poly, you're a Thane.
Wanna hear a joke about Vikings?
Never mind, there's Norway you'd laugh at it.
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