Why do girl ghosts go on diets?
So they can keep their ghoulish figures.
How does Frankenstein eat his dinner?
He bolts it down.
What did the broken hearted skeleton say?
After all to-marrow is another day.
Why did the witch go to the doctor?
She had a dizzy spell.
What did one of Frankenstein’s ears say to the other?
I didn’t know we lived on the same block.
What was it like to fight Medusa?
- At first I was afraid, then I was petrified...
Dracula always read the best selling local newspaper because he heard that it had a good circulation.
When the ghost watched a sad movie he started boo-hooing.
What does Bigfoot do to relax in his spare time?
He goes bird squatching!
Why are vampires like false teeth?
They come out at night.
Why did the troll go running?
To keep up with you!
What did the ghost do at the red light? He came to a dead stop.
Afraid he wouldn’t get into college the skeleton spent the weekend boning up on algebra.
I have no idea how so many people didn’t make it out the labyrinth.
It only took me a minotaur two.
What did one witch's cat say to the other?
You look familiar.
What do Krakens eat?
Fish and ships.
What did the zombie call the girl he was dating?
His ghoul-friend.
What’s a ghoul’s favorite love story?
Romeo and Ghouliet!
What do vegetarian zombies say?
Graaaiiinnss!
What do you call a nervous witch?
A twitch.
Why didn’t the skeleton laugh at the joke?
Because he didn’t have a funny bone.
Why is Frankenstein always asking for help?
He’s looking for someone to give him a hand.
How do you know if you are dealing with a smart zombie?
They are wearing helmets!
What do you call a half man half horse in the middle of an army formation?
The centaur of attention.
The skeleton couldn't keep anything tidy because of his lazy bones.
What is the difference between a deer running away and a small witch?
One is a hunted stag and one is a stunted hag!
What is a Ghost’s favourite treat? Ice-scream floats.
I'm considering becoming a cinematografur.
Ghosts are terrible liars because you can see right through them.
Who does a witch call for help with computer problems?
Hex Support!
How did the witch feel about using her broom to do housework?
She bristled at the suggestion!
What do you call a Minotaur in a playground?
A swing and a myth.
Why don't zombies eat comedians?
They taste funny.
What does a skeleton order at a restaurant?
Spare ribs.
What do you get when you cross a vampire with an ice cube?
You end up with frost bite.
What's a ghost's favorite makeup to wear? Mas-scare-a!
How does Bigfoot stay in shape?
It does Sas-squats.
What did the witch get her cat for entertainment?
A cat-alog.
You will never see a vampire betting on the horses. They can't handle the stakes.
What do you call a ghost who haunts fireplaces? A toastie ghostie.
Why are witches good at farming?
Because they love occult-ivation.
Why did the hotel staff dress as witches for Halloween?
Because they provided broom service!
Scientists believe that one day we will find Sasquatch, just...
Not Yeti.
How do you kill a southern vampire?
You bless his heart.
What's a ghost with a broken leg called? A hoblin goblin.
What do you call a witch's spotless garage?
A broom closet.
What sound does it make when an ogre eats a witch for breakfast?
Snap cackle n' pop
Why is it good to drink witch's brew?
It's very newt-tricious!
Did you hear the story of the little ghoul that grew up?
It became a headhunter!
I'd advise against letting a vampire drive you home after a Halloween party. They never check their mirrors, it will drive you batty.
Go to BabaMail
