Why does it take so long to shave a giant sheep with normal-sized clippers?
Shear size.
Skeleton 1: Why are graveyards so noisy?
Skeleton 2: I don't know. Why?
Skeleton 1: Because of all the coffin.
What do you call a werewolf with no legs?
Anything you like – he can’t chase you.
What do you call a skeleton who goes to school but doesn’t do any work?
Lazy bones.
What’s a werewolve's favorite hobby?
Collecting fleas!
What did the ghost buy at the bar? Boos!
How do you talk to giants?
Use big words!
What do you call a mythical being working in a smoothie store?
Mejuicea.
Why do ghosts and demons get along so well? Demons are a ghoul’s best friend.
Why was the skeleton a success at work?
He had a head for business.
Why do vampires eat lentils?
Because they are so into pulses.
Whats the distant cousin of the werewolf?
The way over therewolf.
What do you call a lie told by a skeleton?
A fibula.
What does the iron-deficient giant say?
- Fi fo fum.
It's easier to prepare meals with this new cookware-wolf.
What happened to the skeleton who sat by the fire for too long?
He became bone dry.
A monster terrorized a village.
He kept doing it ogre and ogre again...
Why didn’t the skeleton play football?
His heart wasn’t in it.
Why are werewolves better than vampires?
Werewolves don’t have a problem with steaks.
Why are vampires like false teeth?
They come out at night.
What type of candy sent the skeleton to the hospital?
Jawbreakers.
What a is ghoul’s favorite pet?
Ghoulfish!
What did the zombie say when she fell out with her vampire friend?
- You're dead to me!
What did Dracula say to the priest who visited his castle?
Don’t you ever cross me!
I don't know what Dracula's address is, but I'm pretty sure he lives on a dead end street.
The skeleton couldn't keep anything tidy because of his lazy bones.
People say Frankenstein’s monster had a temper…
But actually he was surprisingly level-headed.
How does a werewolf make bechamel sauce?
They start with a rooooooooouuuuuuuux.
What is a vampire’s favorite sport?
Casketball.
What do witches put on their bagels?
Scream cheese.
What did the skeleton say to his girlfriend?
- Will you marrow me?
How does Frankenstein jump-start his day?
With a shock of lighting.
What is a wolf’s favorite time of the year?
The howl-o-days.
Why did the skeleton go to acting classes?
He wanted tibia star.
What do you call a cold werewolf?
A chilli dog.
Why did the zombie stop teaching?
He only had one pupil!
A witch with chickenpox is called an itchy-witchy.
How does a vampire bat enter his house?
Through the bat flap.
What did mother werewolf say to the naughty boy werewolf?
- We're werewolves, not swear-wolves.
A ghost's favourite pie flavour is boo-berry.
What do you call a goblin brigand?
A robgoblin.
What did the woman say when she escaped Dracula’s clutches?
- Better luck necks time!
Stealthy minotaurs are always camooflauged.
When does a skeleton laugh?
When someone tickles his funny bone.
Did you know Doctor Frankenstein used to be a lonely, lonely man?
Then he learned how to make friends.
How did the skeleton know it was going to rain?
He could feel it in his bones.
Who did the ghost take to prom? His ghoulfriend.
How do French skeletons say hello?
- Bone-jour!
What’s a ghoul’s favorite love story?
Romeo and Ghouliet!
Werewolf Weather Furcast: Tomorrow we expect heavy showers.
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