Did you see that movie about King Kong, the giant ape?
The plot was pretty bananas.
What do you call a werewolf escapologist?
Hairy Houdini.
What's the Kraken gonna give you that'll make you laugh uncontrollably?
Ten Tickles!
What do you call it when Dr. Frankenstein makes tea?
A monstrositea.
Why do vampires need cold medicine?
For their coffin.
How does Bigfoot stay in shape?
It does Sas-squats.
Sad to hear that Baron von Frankenstein has given up on his dream of being an actor.
He couldn’t get the parts.
All vampires seem to have the same thing for their last meal. A stake.
How does a vampire keep fit?
Batminton.
What is black, white and dead all over?
A zombie in a tuxedo.
What is a Ghost’s favourite toy to play with? Leg-oooooooooooooooo!
What’s a skeleton’s next favorite rock band?
Bone Jovi.
Live to tell the tail.
What did the conductor say when he became a zombie?
Traaaaaaaaiiiinsss!!!
What do you call the last skeleton on earth?
The end-o skeleton.
Last night, like every night, I dreamt I was half horse, half man.
My shrink says I'm just being self centaured.
Who does a witch call for help with computer problems?
Hex Support!
Where are werewolf movies made?
Howl-lywood.
Why did the werewolf laugh while chewing on the skeleton?
He got to the funny bone.
What position does a ghoul play on the soccer team?
Ghoulie!
Witch doctors write their prescriptions in curse-ive.
What's the ghoul's favorite sauce?
Grave-y.
What did the lost witch ask the wizard?
- Witch way to the Halloween party?
Why are witches good at farming?
Because they love occult-ivation.
What do you call it when a monster gets mad?
Ogre-reacting!
Heard a rumor of a giant butterfly in London. Probably just an urban moth.
Frankenstein’s monster was really worried one day.
“Pull yourself together”, said Frankenstein.
What’s a werewolf’s favorite nighttime story?
A hairy tail!
What's the similarity between a sailor and a thief?
Both have a phobia for sirens.
What happened when the zombie refused to pay its ticket from the police?
It was facing grave consequences.
What did one angry werewolf say to the other?
- I have a bone to pick with you!
What do you call a skeleton snake?
A rattler.
What kind of vehicle does Bigfoot drive?
A big toe-truck.
What's a werewolf healed from Lycanthropy?
Over the moon.
Why aren't there more Bigfoot jokes?
There are, but they're really hard to find!
Where do school-going vampires carry their books?
In bat-packs.
What’s a skeleton’s second favorite instrument?
A sax-a-bone.
Why do vampires always dress so nice?
Because they’re so vein!
I met a French vampire who had an attention deficit problem. We called him Drac..ooh la la!
Scientists believe that one day we will find Sasquatch, just...
Not Yeti.
Have you heard about a man who became a werewolf?
He was distressed at first, but then he took a lycan to it.
What do you call a male witch?
Mitch
What is a zombie that speaks two languages?
Zombilingual.
According to Greek mythology, Chiron was a half horse half human doctor.
This made him the Centaur for Disease Control.
What part of the military do zombies serve in?
The marine corpse.
How is Big Foot so good at rock climbing?
He always finds the biggest footholds.
The skeleton couldn't keep anything tidy because of his lazy bones.
Who won the skeleton beauty contest?
No body.
What does the Yeti do when he is tired?
Himalaya down.
Why did the poor werewolf chase his own tail?
He was trying to make ends meet.
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