What would you hear at a cow concert?
Moo-sic.
How do the cool camels say hello?
"How you dune?"
What do you call a funny snake?
Hissssssterical.
What does Pooh Bear call his girl friend?
Hunny.
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator!
What did the dolphin say to the blue whale?
“Cheer up!”
What did the deer say after prancing around a cloning machine for an hour?
“I feel like a million bucks!”
Which technique does a Gorilla borrow from another animal when it gets romantic? The bear hug!
Which side of a koala bear has the most fur? The outside!
All the girls I meet keep thinking I’m a sheep.
Every time they see me they say “Ewe”
The feeling you get when you think you have heard these cow puns before is known as deja-mooo.
What do you call a quiet sheep?
A shhhhhhh-eep.
Why don’t you see penguins in Britain?
Because they’re afraid of Wales.
What are pigs celebrating when they celebrate their birthday? The day they were boar-n.
What country do cows love to visit?
Moo Zealand.
What happened when the tiger ate the comedian?
He felt funny!
What is it called when a dinosaur hits a homerun?
A Dino-Score.
A week after the werewolf swallowed the farmer’s clock, it had ticks all over.
I get beavers and similar animals mixed up.
I otter know better.
What do you call luggage made of snakeskin?
Ex-hiss baggage.
Why are pigs pink when they could be any pig-ment? Sow many reasons.
Any advice on getting a pet pig? Just be sure you get the pig of the litter.
What do you call a dream when a vampire bat is chasing you?
A bat-mare.
What goes dot-dot-croak, dot-dash-croak?
Morse toad.
Why did the beaver stop cutting down trees?
The work gave him gnawsea
Why did the turkey NOT cross the road?
To prove that he wasn't chicken.
What's the difference between a sniper with Parkinson's Disease and a constipated owl?
One can shoot but can't hit...
What is the best period of a bee's relationship?
The honeymoon.
Who were the original transformers? Vampire bats!
What kind of photos do turtles take?
Shell-fies.
Two crows land on a park bench.
They were arrested for conspiring to murder.
What do you call a gorilla stuck in a ventilation shaft
A Duct-ape.
What do you get if you cross a grizzly bear and a harp?
A bear-faced lyre.
The sheep says to the shepherd "you're an jerk and I hate you!" and the shepherd says "Say what?"
And the sheep goes "You herd me!"
What do you call a turtle who takes up photography?
A snapping turtle.
What did the horse say when it saw a sheepdog?
“Why is your furlong?”
What do you call a flamingo that flew into a wall?
A flamingstop.
What's a camel's favorite part of a meal?
Desert!
What do you get when you cross a pig and superman?
The Man of Squeal.
The zookeeper told me I wasn’t allowed to buy the animals so I asked why the zebra had a barcode.
What did one glow worm said to the other one?
You glow girl!
What is a three toed sloth's favorite kind of chip?
Fritos.
What do you call a gorilla with a million dollars?
A gorillanaire
What style of classical music do sheep most enjoy?
Baa-roque
What does Willow Smith say to her pets? I whip my hare back and forth.
Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I’m a goat.
How long has this been going on?
Since I was a kid.
The beavers avoid going deep-diving now. They saw one beaver hitting rock bottom.
What do you call an alligator who is wearing crocs on his feet?
A traitor.
How did the grizzly walk in the snow?
Bear footed.
Where do you send turtles who commit crimes?
To the shell-block.
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