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Why We Should Put the Phone Aside When With Kids

Edited By: Shai K.
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In today's world, our mobile phones have become a hub for work, socializing, news updates, and entertainment. It's no surprise that disconnecting from the screen can be challenging. However, if we are constantly engrossed in our phones when spending time with our children, it can negatively impact their language development and communication skills. This is because distracted parents engage less meaningfully with their children and provide fewer learning opportunities. Extensive research on this topic has consistently shown the importance of giving our undivided attention to our children in order for them to learn and grow.

What impact do parents have on the development of children's language skills?

The foundation of language learning begins within the confines of one's own home, even during infancy. Research has conclusively demonstrated that frequent interaction between parents and toddlers enhances the latter's verbal abilities as they progress in age. Speaking to babies in a high-pitched and endearing manner, using simple words, has been found to boost their linguistic skills and facilitate "conversations" with their caregivers. However, exposure to normal speech delivered in a regular tone is deemed even more vital. When parents engage with mobile devices while interacting with their children, they often feel less connected; consequently, communication may dwindle, hindering opportunities for learning and growth for the children themselves. Ultimately, it is through interactions with those who raise them that children acquire knowledge and develop their linguistic capabilities.
mother with baby

How does the use of mobile phones impact a child's language development?

Numerous studies conducted in the past provide several instances that demonstrate the impact of parents' smartphone usage on their children's language development. For instance, a study published in 2014 revealed that when parents utilize their cell phones during shared meals with their kids, their verbal communication decreases by 20%, while non-verbal communication such as facial expressions and body language increases by 39%. Another study from 2019 indicated that using mobile phones around children is associated with decreased awareness and sensitivity, which leads to children feeling insufficiently valued during the time they spend with their parents. These findings emphasize the need for parents to be mindful of their smartphone use and prioritize meaningful interactions with their children.
In addition, when parents who are engaged in conversation with their children suddenly get interrupted by their phones, it can have a negative impact on the children's ability to communicate. A study conducted in 2022 found that children whose parents exhibit this behavior tend to acquire fewer essential social skills like maintaining eye contact, paying attention to the person speaking to them, and being responsive. These deficits can adversely affect their language development and overall communication abilities.
Furthermore, a study from 2017 revealed that parents who frequently get distracted by their phones while interacting with their children are less effective at teaching them new things, including language skills. In the study, parents were instructed to teach their kids new words. However, whenever there was an interruption from the phone during these interactions, the children struggled to learn those words effectively. Conversely, when there were no interruptions from electronic devices during these sessions of teaching and learning new words occurred without any issues.
These findings highlight how distractions caused by phone usage can hinder both social and educational aspects of child development. Parents should be mindful of minimizing disruptions during quality time spent with their children in order to promote healthy communication skills and facilitate effective learning experiences for them.
Numerous research studies consistently demonstrate the same clear outcome - using a cell phone in proximity to children, despite its seemingly innocuous nature, detrimentally impacts your ability to foster their language skills development. 
father with baby girl

How can we minimize smartphone usage when with our children? 

Reducing mobile phone usage is not an easy task and it is inevitable that you will still need to use it in the presence of your children. However, there are ways to be less distracted during crucial moments while conversing with them. Moreover, you can also limit mobile phone usage to some extent, thereby mitigating the adverse effects on their language development.

Here are some recommended positive habits for you:
- Designate specific hours without phones: During these designated hours, place your mobile phone in another room and fully engage yourself in activities and conversations with your children.
Mute your phone: It can be difficult to ignore a constantly ringing and alerting phone, so activate the Do Not Disturb mode or silence the notifications when you're dedicating quality time to your children.
Allocate phone-free zones in your home: Decide for yourself that certain areas, like the playroom and dining room, should be spaces without a phone. In these designated rooms, you will have uninterrupted and undistracted time with your kids.
- Minimize the appeal of your phone: If there are apps that you find yourself automatically opening as soon as you pick up your mobile device, avoid placing their icons on the main screen. By doing this, they won't be easily accessible. Additionally, consider changing the interface colors to less vibrant shades of gray. This can help reduce the attractiveness of your smartphone and make it appear more mundane.

When it comes to using your cell phone in the presence of children, it's important to have valid reasons for doing so. Whether you're attending an important call, scheduling a doctor's appointment, capturing a video as a keepsake, or checking what items are needed for kindergarten tomorrow, make sure you explain these actions to your children. This way, you can maintain an ongoing interaction with them and avoid missing out on valuable moments.

Rather than solely viewing screen time as detrimental to child-parent interactions, consider how smartphones can actually enhance these connections. For instance, engaging in a video call with grandparents is not only a wonderful opportunity for language development but also allows you to utilize your cell phone effectively. So the next time you plan on contacting your parents, opt for a video call that includes the children in the conversation.
 

Keep in mind that completely eliminating mobile phone usage around children may not be necessary, even unfeasible, and may make children even more attracted to the "forbidden fruit". However, reducing excessive use and utilizing it wisely will ultimately yield significant benefits that you won't regret later on.

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