Marriage is undoubtedly a topic that fascinates many people, whether they got married recently or decades ago, others who are considering tying the knot with their beloved, and even researchers. Maintaining a healthy relationship after marriage is certainly a challenge, and those who have been married for many years know this well. Perhaps that's why there are numerous studies and articles on the subject. We wanted to uncover their conclusions and see what science has to say after examining marriage from various aspects, such as health and gender. We were definitely surprised by what we discovered, and you are invited to read about 7 different studies that shed some light on marriage, and perhaps offer insights and tips that will help you understand your own relationship better.
1. Is There a Difference Between Marital Crises and Those in Cohabitation?
In recent years, more and more couples prefer to avoid marriage and remain in a "domestic partnership" or "cohabitation" status. One reason is the fear that marriage will ruin the unique bond they have created, but can other statuses help them maintain the relationship? According to a 2017 study conducted in the UK, the answer is no.
To examine this, a survey was conducted among more than 15,000 married and unmarried people aged 16-74, where they were asked about the reasons that led to their breakup with their partners in the past 5 years. The motivations reported by both groups were similar, including factors such as growing apart, arguments, infidelity, and lack of respect/appreciation. Since more commonalities than differences were found in the reasons for breakup in both groups, it can be said that there is no significant difference between divorce and separation from any other committed relationship. From this, it can be learned that what matters in a relationship is not its status, but its quality, which often stems from the ability to communicate and resolve issues properly. Want to have a healthy relationship? In the following guide you'll learn tips for maintaining a happy and long-lasting relationship, whether within marriage or not, and in the following article you will learn great methods to help you make up after a fight.
2. What Affects Our Health More, Marriage or Divorce?
Many studies suggest that there is a direct and positive connection between marriage and our health, but the conclusions of a 2017 article published by Oxford University somewhat question this. The study aimed to answer the significant question: what affects our health more – marriage or divorce? After 16 years of data collection, surprising findings emerged, showing that marriage or weddings have a relatively minor impact on our health and lives. On the other hand, divorce has a much stronger impact, three times that of marriage, and thus separation requires those who go through it to undergo a more significant healing process. As a result, and in light of previous research findings, the studies concluded that marriage is not necessarily associated with improved health, but with a more positive outlook on life.
3. Do Marriage Impacts Differ Between Men and Women?
Ever felt that marriage affects you differently than your partner? According to a fascinating study published in 2011 at the University of California, it seems that such a relationship indeed benefits one side more – men. The reason, according to evidence gathered for the study, is that arguments negatively affect women more than men, both psychologically and health-wise. According to the study, it appears that the reason for this is their awareness of their lower social status and lesser power compared to their husbands, which requires them to change their behavior during arguments or when facing obstacles to survive them properly. Hence, it can be said that the increased worry they feel and the awareness of this social status derived from marriage and their gender, may negatively affect their health. To boost self-confidence and thus feel better in the relationship, check out the following guide.
4. Which Partner Encourages Health and Fitness More?
Do you also need to convince your partner to exercise or eat salad? It turns out you’re not alone, and many old studies have dealt with this issue, proving that women tend to be the "motivators" in the relationship. This claim was examined, among others, in an American study published in 2012 that examined 40 married heterosexual couples, and same-sex couples – 15 pairs of men and 15 of women, who were in long-term relationships.
Among all couples, it was found that there is one side that pushes the other and encourages them to maintain a healthier lifestyle, and among most heterosexual couples, it is the women who do so, as previous studies have shown. Among same-sex couples, and even among some heterosexual couples, mutual influence was found. Therefore, if previous studies had overwhelmingly found that women care more about the health of others while men do not – the current article proves that men can also do this, and it all depends on the dynamics within the relationship.
5. Can a Partner Alleviate the Negative Effects of Childhood Abuse?
Many people who suffered from childhood abuse hope to find comfort in a good relationship with someone who will support them in difficult times, but in reality, they tend to enter problematic relationships full of obstacles. A 2017 study tried to shed some light on this claim and examine whether childhood abuse has a lasting and unchangeable impact on relationships, or if it depends on certain traits or behaviors that can be changed to improve the relationship. The study included more than 400 newlywed couples from impoverished neighborhoods, some of whom experienced the same abuse.
The findings indicate that negative childhood experiences had a later impact, leading to depression symptoms and less satisfaction with married life. It was also found that relationships and love do not really help to escape the consequences of that abuse, so if you know someone who experienced it – suggest they seek professional treatment rather than rely on loved ones to save them from suffering.
6. Do Pre-Wedding Doubts Lead to Divorce?
Do doubts before marriage indicate a future difficulty that could burden the relationship, or should they be ignored in hopes for the best? If this question intrigues you as well, the following 2012 study will clarify things. In it, 464 married people were asked if they were sure about their wedding, and their answers were compared to indicators of people who had been divorced for 4 years. The study findings show that members of both groups reported such hesitations, with ⅔ of couples reporting doubts before the wedding and lower satisfaction with the relationship afterward. From this, it can be concluded that doubts exist in every relationship – even among married couples, and they provide no stable basis for predicting the future of the relationship without considering other factors.
7. Is There a Way to Improve Married Life?
Believe it or not, a 2013 study conducted at Northwestern University in Illinois may have led to a proven method that could help you maintain, and even improve, your marriage! It’s a great approach that, with just paper and a pen, may provide wonderful results with minimal external intervention. To prove it actually works, 120 couples participated in the study, half of whom were required to report in writing for 7 minutes once every 4 months for two years on various aspects of their relationship, such as satisfaction, love, intimacy, trust, passion, and commitment. In addition, they were also asked to write from an objective perspective about important arguments that arose with their spouse during that time.
In the first year of the experiment, it appeared that all participants – both those who reported and those who did not – experienced a decline in the quality of married life. The difference between the two groups was recorded only at the end of the second year, when the couples who were required to report did not report any decrease in relationship satisfaction. The reason for this was that although members of both groups argued with their spouse to the same extent, those who were required to report simply attributed less importance to those events or learned to deal with them better. If you also want to apply the study's conclusions, take a pen and paper, and dedicate just 21 minutes a year (7 minutes once every 4 months) to an objective recording of events that happened in your married life. Good luck!
